A chicken with its head cut off

Can the world just stop for one second so I can get a little breather? This post is going to be a little bit "poor-me" for a few minutes, but after the whole moving fiasco it should be a familiar tune to BeachBucket readers.

Issue #1: Too much going on/too short of a summer. Last Thursday the kids and I declared "International Do Nothing Day" but by the time the day was out, Luke had had two separate playdates and a karate class. All I want is some time to sit around and not have to take people anywhere or pack any lunches. File under: Not gonna happen.

Issue #2: Zach's ongoing ear issues have plagued me and worried his teachers. Yesterday I spent the whole day taking Zach to a hearing test (inconclusive because his ears were too full of fluid); speaking to a developmental specialist about possible therapies to help him get back on track socially/developmentally; taking Zach to the ENT, where they decided to do another surgery and possible adenoidectomy; and then spending two hours at the hospital doing intake and blood tests for Zach. It was fun for absolutely no one.

Issue #3: Dave's 'pre-hernia" situation, a worrisome development that has kept him sitting or lying down for the better part of the last three weeks. I've picked up most of the slack on household chores/running the kids around, which has been draining on both of us. If it actually evolves into a full-fledged hernia, that'll mean surgery, which will be fun for how many people? Again, none.

Issue #4: This one is actually a good thing - An Internet developer has asked me to take a key role in a cool new startup relating to Jolly Tomato work - and he wants to put it on a fast track. I can't say any more at all, except to say it is going to be fun, and I think I'm going to like working on it. The only problem is squeezing even an extra hour out of the day, after wrangling two kids, managing medical situations, working as a speechwriter, and writing/developing a food blog. I've been burning the midnight oil just trying to find a few extra hours for this new project. Needless to say BeachBucket has fallen by the wayside. But no one is going to give me a hard time about that, given all that's going on, right? Right?

So - happy times - the Florida cousins are in town. On Saturday Dave gave the boys a quick lesson on automatic weapons in the "man cave." Curiously, the best shots appeared to be Zach and Joanna.

On Sunday, Zach had a bike race (a neat follow-up to last week's running race), and the most notable part of it seemed to be his training regimen. All day long, on Saturday, he insisted on having someone (thank you, Joanna) hold up a "finish line" for him, and he would ride around in a big circle, repeatedly breaking through the finish line. Clearly he understands the importance of visualizing the race.

Now the race was fun and all, and he did cross the finish line (although there was nothing to "break"), but for me the most interesting part was going home. There is a very steep hill that leads down to where the race was held, and when we were heading back up the hill he INSISTED on riding his bike rather than walking it. It's almost like he knew it would be harder so he wanted to do it. As he grimaced and pushed the pedals all the way up the hill (and refused help), Dave and I looked at each other and agreed, "Now there's an endurance athlete waiting to be born." (Preemie, schmeemie.)

On Sunday Joanna and Suzi had the greatest inspiration ever and decided we should do a family fiesta. This was good news for me, because having just moved I knew exactly where to find our "fiesta box" of party decorations. And it was good news for Dave and others because it meant an excuse to go to both El Indio and La Venadita for tortilla/meat supplies. Add some of Suzi's rice, Tony's tilapia, and Bobbie's guacamole, and pretty soon you've got a fiesta.

A second great innovation was to have a pinata. Sure, there were only four kids, but what kid would turn down an opportunity to whack a papier-mache creation and have candy fall out of it? Not any of ours, apparently.

Zach picked out the pinata because he wanted a baby chick, but I think most of us agree that this pinata looked more like a chicken, if not Big Bird himself. (Note: the boys' shirts are off and pants are wet because they just finished having a massive water-gun battle, another key element to a family fiesta.)

The good news: It didn't take a chainsaw (a la Steve Martin) to cut open; Luke finally cracked it in half with a power swing learned in Little League. Joanna and I had tried to minimize the amount of candy, but even still the boys were excited about rubber balls, paratroopers, punching balloons, applesauce, and fruit leather.

As for what happened after that, I have no further comment.

In the green time

Many moms pack child-appropriate picnics and then take their kids out for lunch at a park. Zach and I like to go to the Argentine butcher shop in a nearby strip mall, buy the fresh-baked empanadas while they're piping hot, and then eat them right outside the shop. Beef or spinach, it doesn't matter. My kind of kid, right there.

Speaking of eclectic food situations, Dave brought us all to a Nathan's hot-dog-eating contest last week. I tweeted about it with a twinge of regret - would I lose followers who are committed to my otherwise nutritious cause? But I decided to lighten up - I even ate a hot dog - and I didn't lose any followers, at least as far as I know. Oh, and Luke got an autograph after the fact from the up-and-coming star named Mega Toad (a skinny little teenager). After watching the (gross) competition, however, none of us has any aspirations to be competitive eaters.

Luke has spent the last two weeks inviting practically everyone he knows to his belt test at his karate (well, technically tae kwan do) class. It's curious because he absolutely refused to take part in the talent show (he was dreading the thought of dancing) but he wanted everyone to see him doing karate. So with Luke's fans filling up half of the cafeteria yesterday, he performed beautifully in front of the crowd.

Dave has some video of it, but I don't think even that will capture just how sweet it was when he finally knelt in front of his teacher and she said a few words quietly to him about how he had gone above and beyond, and she had decided that he earned the right to skip over the yellow belt. As she carefully wrapped the green belt around his uniform, a few folks (you know who you are) even got a little teary-eyed.

Dave and Zach just got back from the Father's Day party at Zach's school, and one of the presents for the dads was one of those questionnaires that the teachers help the kids fill out about their dads. Excerpts from Zach's include: "My dad is as tall as...a crocodile." "My dad is stronger than...a building made of big wood." "I love him because...he's nice and charges the iPad."

Point of curiosity: The other night at dinner I asked everyone, "If you could change anything about our new house, what would it be?"
Dave: "I wish all of the construction on the street was finished" (two new houses are being built and one is undergoing a major remodel)
Jeanne: "I wish we had more pictures hanging on the wall so it really felt like our house."
Luke: "We should have an electric television built into the dining room table, so if you're just sitting here eating and you're bored, you can push a button and a TV rises up right here and you can watch whatever you want."
Zach: "We should dye more eggs."

Friends and neighbors

We have neighbors. Boy, do we have neighbors. The street is crawling with kids of all ages. But our most significant neighbors are the ones directly across the street from us who have two kids, ages 4 and 7. I've actually known the mom and kids somewhat distantly for a while, but we haven't seen them much in our regular circuit because the kids go to a private school. But that hasn't stopped Luke and the older boy Alex from being Instant Best Friends. Here is how the conversation went the first time they met:

Luke: "I just wanted to know...Do you like Legos?"
Alex: "Yeah."
Luke: "Do you have any Alien Conquest?"
Alex: "No, but I really want some. I was just looking at them on the computer." [Editor's note: Total. Luke. Clone.]
Luke: "Well, I was wondering... I just got the new Alien Conquest, the big one, and I wanted to know if you want to come over and build it with me?"

After a week of friendly greetings every morning (when they see us leaving, they stick their heads out the window to say hi), Alex and his sister Ella came over on Sunday with a big bag of homemade "welcome to the neighborhood" cookies. The boys built Legos all morning and they acted like long-lost friends: they independently worked out a system for how they were going to take turns with each of the building steps so that they would get an equal amount of turns to make stuff.

Yesterday they continued building a little more until Alex had to leave. But when he saw Luke leaving the house at around dinnertime, Alex stuck his head out the window and called,"Luke, how is the Lego going?" "Not too good," reported Luke glumly. Then, later, when he got it figured out, Luke stuck his head out the door to report to Alex, "Hey, I fixed the Lego! It's awesome!"

It's like having soup cans attached by a string, except we don't even need the soup cans.

We could be imagining things, but Dave and I both agree that Luke and Zach seem to be getting along with each other much better in the new house as well. There's a long center hall that they love to run down. Plus there's a massive shower stall in their bathroom that is just too much fun for only one kid to take a shower at a time. And the gymnastics mat in the garage seems to be just big enough to contain a 7-year-old's kata and a 4-year-old's somersaults.

On Monday at Author's Night at our downtown bookstore, Luke had a chance to read from a book he has been working on for most of this semester. It's an extremely detailed book with heavy Harry Potter themes. He had been very nervous about reading it in front of all of the parents, but he managed to conquer his nervousness and he did an amazing job reading to everyone.

Afterwards they announced that they were serving cookies in the courtyard, and there was a massive kid stampede out to the cookie table. Zach wasn't quite quick enough or bold enough to muscle through the crowd, so I held him on my lap and told him we would just wait to get a cookie. But seconds later...Luke emerged from the crowd holding two enormous cookies, and presented them to Zach: "I got one for me and one for you - You can pick which one you want."

What mature alien has invaded Luke's body?

Last, since we're on the topic of Luke - Last night I had the opportunity to bring Luke and his friend Eitan to a special cookie party-slash-movie premiere of "Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer" in Hollywood. The premiere was swarming with kids of all ages, but somehow all of the seven-year-old boys managed to find each other. Luke wound up becoming instant friends with this kid named Sawyer, and they sat next to each other and giggled throughout the movie, and we all went out to dinner with each other afterwards. Now Luke and Sawyer are begging for a playdate, which is insane, because even though Sawyer's family technically lives in the L.A. area, they are 50 miles away from us. I'm just putting it out there as one thing that amazes me about Luke - He can make friends with anyone, anywhere. I mean, who makes a friend at a movie? And more importantly, do I really need to set up a 50-mile playdate when I could just...take him across the street?

Scenes from a Day

Time: 7:00 am
The scene: From the upstairs master bedroom, I step out on the balcony to see...Luke and Zach on the karate mat in the garage (both in pajamas) and Luke teaching Zach karate. Dave watches while holding a cup of coffee.

Time: 5:45 pm
The scene: Dave and Luke are at baseball practice; Zach is helping me get dinner ready in the kitchen. He is singing, at top volume, "My Favorite Things," except he is making every word start with "B" - as in "Ben buh bog bites, ben buh bee bings, ben bi'm beeling bad..."

Time: 7:45 pm
The scene: On Fridays, when Dave tours open houses, the agents sometimes give him leftover food or treats. Today he came home with the Holy Grail of open-house treats: a set of four cake pops. Dave got called off on a conference call, but he told Luke and Zach they could go ahead and enjoy the treats without him. No further invitation needed.