3 quick things

One - What would I do without Dave? He puts Luke to bed at night; deals with the nanny transition in the morning; deals with stuff like coming home early; usually cooks and does the dishes; takes out the trash; does all the spreadsheets; encourages me to 'relax and have a good time' while Luke is napping on my days off; and works really, really hard and is really good at his job. Am I doing enough? Am I just super-lucky?

Two - How can I be a better employer? Current m.o. is to suffer in silence when something bothers me, then complain to Dave, then have him relate it to Silvia in the morning. Clearly that's not so effective, and is basically stressful to everyone. Must work on this.

Three - What would I do if my house were completely underwater? What would I try to save? Are the tangible things the memories that are really important? Questions worth asking as we think about selling the house. It breaks my heart to think about 'needing' to leave the house where Luke first crawled, took his first steps, etc. All of the memories in his room, in our room, in the playroom and down the hall, in the dining room and out in the backyard where we've had so many fun parties...Would it all be worth it if I got to stay home instead of working?

hap-py

Luke seems to have gotten over his tummy trouble for the time being.

On Saturday night, we decided to go to the Cuban restaurant and we told him we were going out to get beans. He was so excited that was all he could think/talk about. When we got to the restaurant, as soon as he saw the host (maitre d') he shouted "Beans!" Then as soon as he saw a waiter coming to our table, he called out "Beans!" again, as if that would get the beans there sooner. When the beans finally came to the table he had a momentary panic because we couldn't find a spoon quickly enough. But all was well once he could happily dig in.

Then yesterday after his nap he had lunch outside in the backyard, at his new picnic table for the first time. He was so happy eating a bowl of peas that he was actually dancing a little jig in his seat while sitting down. Then he shouted out, "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!!! Hap-py!!!!!!"

I said to Dave, "Do you think that means he's happy?"

Watching him get back to to his normal self almost makes up for the misery of being sick...

honey

Small triumphs rule: A month ago, I would never have guessed that Luke would be able to fall asleep in his crib by himself at night. But Dave, with his golden touch, has somehow made it possible. Last night we did a silent victory dance after Luke went to sleep with only a little whimper. Not bad for a kid who basically has nursed to sleep for his entire life. Today was another story, when at naptime Luke raged for 15 minutes in the crib while I prayed for him to go to sleep. I don't think I have the same magic touch as Dave. Or something.

Anyway, Luke is just a regular fountain of words these days. My favorite is "honey" and "money" (used appropriately at the supermarket, when all of the change spills out of the machine). Money seems to be one of my favorite words as the moment, as I seem to be incessantly fantasizing about winning the lottery and quitting my job. Maybe it's just the quitting my job part. Well, one of these days I'll have some kind of resolution about it. I'm sure I'll look back years from now and just laugh...

long time no e

Just trying to get the motivation back to post again. I guess I don't need to say this but after my long, drawn-out period of extreme hunger and tiredness and no period, it turned out I was not pregnant after all. I guess I had just jumped ahead and made way too many plans and had way too many expectations. Sad but nuff said. The upside is that it does give me more time to focus on the L-word, hahahahahahaha, that is to say Luke. He has had so much amazing development in his speaking and recognition that I want to write it down so I remember it. Like today at the supermarket checkout when he made everyone laugh by pointing at the change machine and saying, clear as a bell, "Money!" Or when Dave was putting him to sleep and started singing "Go to sleep, go to sleep, my sweet baby Luu-uuuke" and Luke bolted upright and said "No, no - mama!" (that's my song!)
Stopping nursing has been a big rough spot for me. If Luke were competely uninterested, or even marginally uninterested, I think I'd be able to distract him out of it. But he seems to need it and flip out if I don't let him, so it's really hard to draw the line between 'am I just spoiling him by giving in' and 'I just need to give him what he needs'. I have started throwing mental darts at all of the people in society who look down on this. If it weren't for trying to get pregnant I would just keep nursing until whenever, society be damned.
Nice note to end on, right? It's a beautiful Friday night, delightfully chilly, and Dave is putting Luke to sleep. Soon he'll be downstairs (that is, Dave) (I hope) and we'll curl up and watch a movie, and talk about how when you get down to it, life is really good right now.