Hyper speed

And...we're back! Seems like just yesterday, or not, that we were all in this space together. Where did the time go? No, seriously, where did it go, because I need it back. Since I last checked in, we've been to Montecito and Terranea, Zach and Dave have gotten a year older, and our marriage has gotten a year sweeter.

So, to rewind back in order, first the boys and my parents and I went to Montecito for spring break. We stayed at this amazing hacienda ("estancia") that had so many gates I was compelled to photograph all of them.

And we had a special Argentine barbecue that yielded some amazing steaks, plus it came in handy for marshmallow roasting. (I don't know why this picture always makes me laugh, but it does.)

And then we all basically chilled out in various relaxing spots throughout the hacienda (I'm sorry, estancia).

Two weeks later we had our annual Eastover egg hunt:

...and then Luke aged 10 years overnight to become 70s Guy for Decade Night at cotillion. By the way, last year he declared he would "NEVER, EVER" go to cotillion, and this year he loves it and at one point was named King of Cotillion. He was not-so-secretly pleased with this outfit because all the girls were telling him how cool he looked.

And then THIS adorable guy turned SEVEN YEARS OLD. Hold me. Wasn't he just a little bundle in a stroller? He is so sweet and funny I just can't resist giving him a big squeeze every time I see him. Me: "Do you looooooove me?" Zach (exasperated sigh): "Well of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"

On Zach's birthday night I had an invitation to a behind-the-scenes event at Dodger Stadium. Instead of forcing Zach through something that he probably wouldn't enjoy, I had Zach and Dave stay home and entertain a series of Zach's friends who came over to the house. Meanwhile, Luke and I went ahead and met Tommy Lasorda:

And of course as EVERYONE knows, the day after Zach's birthday is Dave's and my anniversary. (Insert image of cooing doves pulling a banner draped with flowers, and then cut to me with big cartoon hearts popping out of my eyes.) We took off as soon as I got home from work and headed out to Terranea, where we had a most romantic dinner looking out over the ocean.

And then the next day, Dave brought the boys out and we all celebrated together in the hot tub. Why? Because it was outrageously windy and only the most insane people (OK, Luke and Zach) were venturing into the regular pool.

And then some more time passed and next thing you knew I was gone again, this time to San Antonio for Unk's jubilee celebration. It was a great weekend because I got to spend some nice grown-up time with my parents and my sister and my uncle.

And that brings us up to date! Sorry if anyone got whiplash... and stay tuned until next time when I try to capture the entire summer in one post!

Brothers

Here's Luke, my major leaguer. He's a great pitcher, a solid hitter, and a speedy runner - a triple threat, if you will. Thanks to Bill-o for the great shot that captures some of that steely determination.

Incidentally, Luke's baseball is great for Zach because Luke's teammate's little brother Chase is one of Zach's best friends. That means that the interminable - oops, I mean compelling - games and practices just fly by while the Zach and Chase play together on the sidelines. Yesterday Chase and Zach were playing basketball, when suddenly the game came to a complete halt because they found a fuzzy caterpillar on the court:

Later Chase told Dave: "Zach and I are like brothers. We like the same things, we like to hang out, and we never argue."
To which Dave responded, "Uh...so you're not really like brothers at all."

Bragtime

For Luke's California mission project, he created a version of Mission Santa Cruz on Minecraft. This took him many, many hours and it involved no help whatsoever from his parents. Yes, a few other kids did their missions on the computer too. But what Luke created was so cool, and so detailed, and so incredible, that it had everyone agape.

At Night at the Missions last week (all the kids show off their mission creations to the parents) Luke attracted a steady crowd of people, especially girls (!), and most notably, the principal. 

The principal was so impressed with Luke's mission and thoughtful presentation (and his stated desire to become an architect) that we got an email from her later that night. Our local assemblyman was going to be at school the next day and she asked Luke and three other kids to bring their mission presentations back to show the assemblyman. (Do you see my heart pounding out of my chest, cartoon-style, with pride yet?) 

So he showed his mission to the assemblyman on Friday...and THEN this morning the principal came up to Dave to tell her how proud she was of Luke. She told Dave "how articulate and calm Luke was in the presence of an important person. The assemblyman is not too tech-savvy and he was extremely impressed." Do you see me just collapsing on the floor with pride? 

The final cake-topper: He got an A (and heaps of compliments) from his teacher on both the model and the report. Atta boy.  

Gap Days

What's going on? Oy. If I tried to tell you, say, an issue that we were facing, by the time I'd write about it on here it would already be ancient history. So one solution is to stick with generalities. Another solution is to try to write what's going on with the caveat that it may be out of date by the time any given person may read it.

I guess I could have posted at some point about worrying about losing our favorite babysitter ever. Lauren got engaged and moved to go to graduate school and live near her fiance. Could it have been a huge mess without a reliable babysitter? Definitely. But we have been blessed with amazing, wonderful caretakers, and as soon as Lauren left, the amazing Kiara stepped right up and filled in without missing a beat on Tuesdays and Thursdays. (Kiara, you may remember, was one of the counselors at Zach's beach camp who kept telling me every day how much she loved Zach, until I finally asked if she would babysit.) So what could have been a mess turned into a smooth and easy transition, and the boys absolutely adore her.

It's a good thing, too, because Dave has been super-busy (and happy) gaining a near-monopoly on local real estate. The amazing thing about Dave is his super-human discipline, and even though he works insane hours (up answering emails by 6am; continuing to work through 10pm) he still manages to keep on top of things like running and just recently completed a half marathon.

Meanwhile, I've been holding down the fort managing the little stuff like laundry, grocery shopping, playdates, and bill-paying...plus the occasional blog event or farm trip that keeps me entertained. Our weekend in the casita at Terranea was spectacular, of course, and two friends of Luke's were able to join us on the second night for dinner and s'mores by the fire. Incidentally, it could have been a disaster with Zach hanging out as a third wheel to the 10-year-old boys. But that night we happened to run into the family of one of Zach's best friends who were also staying at the resort. We got both Zach and his friend Strider into the kids' club that night, and they had a blast. Couldn't have worked out better if we planned it.

So right now, Zach is... a social butterfly. When it's time to go to school he cannot be contained; he runs ahead of the rest of us to make sure he gets maximum playground time with  his friends before school starts. Last weekend a friend invited him over to play on Saturday. On Sunday, the mom texted me to ask sheepishly, "Could Zach come over again? Jimmy wants to play with him more." This week he met up with his friend Chase at the park a few times, and they promised each other they would hang out on Saturday. Saturday rolled around and they had a play date that turned into a movie...that finally turned into a sleepover because they were having too much fun to break it up. Part of it is his go-along and get-along personality; he's happy to jump up at a moment's notice or latch on to a last-minute cobbled-together plan. When you consider all of the events we've had to drag him to on his brother's behalf, it's no wonder that he's the most laid back and easily entertained of any of us.

Luke is...focused. He is extremely driven to stay in good shape, eat healthy foods, and stay on top of his work. He finished his report on Mission Santa Cruz with great aplomb; he's been building a model on Minecraft (yes! a school-approved use of Minecraft) to finish the assignment. Has he mentioned to you that he wants to be an architect? He's been studying the houses around us with as much rigor as his dad, and will solemnly tell you that he prefers Spanish or contemporary styling. One of my friends told me that she thought ever since she first knew him in kindergarten that he would be a great architect. "He's a great builder, of course, with all the Legos...But he's also a great listener and I can really see him talking to clients, listening to all of the things that they say, and then delivering what they want."

Luke is also car-obsessed and will spend hours building models of cars online. When Dave's client told him that she was going to need to buy a car, Dave put Luke on the task of researching and finding the perfect car for him. And...one of the three cars that he finally presented to her was the car that she wound up buying. Dave gave Luke a little "commission" for his good work, and the client has promised Luke a test drive. 

So I'm going to wrap this up by saying, tentatively, cautiously, that...we're happy. Everyone is doing pretty darned well. Of course there are big and small things we'd love to change. But as far as a once-a-month check in on this forum goes, things are good. Let's keep it that way.

Foursome

Wait - Was I supposed to write something on here? I thought it just got filled in all by itself.

Anyway, the kids got taller, Dave and I got more tired, and we tucked away a few days of 2014 under our belt. Our first vacation of 2014 (vacation already!?!) was a road trip up to San Francisco by way of the mission at Santa Cruz (fourth grade project). It took FOREVER to get through Friday afternoon traffic up to Santa Cruz, and we wound up stopping overnight in some cow town on the way up but we finally made it to Stop #1 on Saturday morning. (I'm getting much more efficient with pictures; I'm packaging them in foursomes.)

They say that Santa Cruz is one of the *least* interesting missions to visit because there's the least left of it, but I found it pretty darned interesting. I hope to get to a few more before fourth grade is over.

Then it was off to the City By the Bay for a crazy-cool weekend in this fun hotel apartment that we "won" at a silent auction last year. The residence is located INSIDE the old Ghirardelli factory (the "Cocoa Building" to be precise) and it has two bedrooms, two baths, a beautiful kitchen and living room, exposed brick walls, a bay view, and every amenity you could ask for including a Town Car at your service.

The first morning we went to Alcatraz, which Luke feared, because as you remember, "creepy museums" are his least favorite thing. And yet who listened to the audio tour of the Alcatraz escape not once, not twice, but three times, as we all waited patiently for him to finish?

Here is a surprisingly grim photo montage of Alcatraz that Dave made:

Although this montage is technically correct, it is quite sterile compared to the actual island, which has all sorts of interesting nooks and crannies, as well as fascinating gardens. I thought I would add in this shot I took, looking out from the guard door in the Alcatraz recreation yard. You can just barely make out the Golden Gate Bridge in the distance:

.
..and Dave showing the boys the view:

...and Luke stuck in the prison cell:

...and, upon return back to the city, the sea lions lounging at Pier 39 (which Zach could have watched all day, like TV):

And then we piled in the car again to head over the Golden Gate Bridge and out onto the vista point with the view finders. Worth noting: Beautiful weather, highs in the 70s all weekend.

Wouldn't it be fun to take a road trip with us? Well now you can, with this brief snippet of life in the car with the four of us, driving down Lombard Street ("I smell bacon!"). Believe me, it's as good as (if not better) than being there.

Perfect Bundle

Who's been entertaining, amazing, and inspiring us for a full decade now?

Why, Elinel, of course.

It is late and the Eagles are winning so I won't belabor this point too much except to say that Luke is The Man. His wry humor, his steely determination and his unflinching curiosity make him the most interesting 10-year-old I know. He is the only kid I've ever met who can recite every feature on the 2014 line of Range Rovers, or who can give you the whole IMDB rundown on every movie he sees.

He has more self-discipline than most kids twice his age; he does daily situps, pushups, and pullups; he heads out on long runs with Dave whenever possible; he chooses healthy foods and is opening his mind to new foods daily. Amazingly, he's become an incredible climber in the last three months and he is itching to try out his new skills on some real rocks on a future camping trip.

People say he looks like Dave and I can see it now: the almond eyes, the winning smile, and the lean physique. When I think of him, my heart practically pops out of my chest, cartoon-style, swelling with pride and admiration. Such a good, sweet kid.

Happy birthday, my 10-year-old boy. I love you.

Ring In the New

Seventeen years ago, I spent the first Thanksgiving away from home. (Hard to believe, I had spent every Thanksgiving at home until I was 28 years old.) That year, I headed out to Palm Springs to be with this new guy and his family. At the time, I was still contemplating my next move. But Palm Springs in November...that was a pretty nice selling point. He definitely had me there.

This year we headed out to the desert on the weekend before Thanksgiving and we traveled with two boys, four suitcases, two iPads, two iPhones, two MacBooks, and an iTouch. We left one cat behind. More complicated? Sure. But some things remain the same: The In-n-Out Burger stop in Moreno Valley. The deep, cleansing breaths you take as soon as the wind turbines come into view. The twinkly lights on all of the palm trees once you roll into town.

This time, we were far enough out in the desert (Rancho Mirage) that Dave was determined to take the boys on a big off-the-beaten-path hike on Saturday. When you put the word "big" next to the word "hike" my brain starts getting sour and cranky, so I opted out for the day. Instead I rented a car and headed to the outlet center for some hard-core shopping (some things never change; to each her own). Little did I know the treacherous conditions that the boys would face at "Ladder Canyon."

Fortunately, it was one of those things that I only had a chance to worry about after the fact, so everyone was fine and had a great time doing their respective things. I suppose to some people fighting the crowds at the Coach outlet is a lot scarier.

We've worked our way through a lot of restaurants in the desert, but one that remains the same is the Japanese teppan steakhouse that provides us endless hours of entertainment. After years of going there, we thought we had seen all of the tricks, until - surprise! - this time we had a new young chef who wowed us with all sorts of dazzling knife-and-fork feats. We were seated at the table with a bunch of happy-drunk Canadian golfers, and although they were not offensive in any way, at least one of them was self-conscious enough about being drunk (those Canadians!) that he insisted on slipping Dave $60 before they left as an "apology."

Standing at the koi pond outside Kobe

Riding on a little high from our newfound wad of cash (!), we headed up to El Paseo in Palm Desert, the Rodeo Drive of the desert. It was our good fortune that they had just finished the holiday decorating and they had a full-on "snowstorm" (big frothy bits of soap) in the middle of the street - making it the closest we would get to "cold" weather all week.

The next morning the sun was out, which meant it was time to dash over to Splashtopia, the massive water park at our resort. We didn't waste any time jumping right in to the lazy river and waterslides.

How many calories do you burn per hour on the lazy river? Because I could do that all day.

Anyway, it was somewhere around this point that I called my parents and then started to feel bad. They were out there suffering through a deep chill, while we were lounging around in the sun. But when you move across the country away from your family, you pay the price all the time. So you've got to have at least a few perks built in to make it fun, right?

Luke did a big report this semester on Palm Springs, so we headed downtown on Sunday night for a fancy dinner at LG's Steakhouse. (Quote from Luke's report: "If you stay in L.A., you can go to McDonald's. But if you go to Palm Springs, you can have a nice, juicy steak at LG's Steakhouse.") In honor of his report, we enjoyed a nice, juicy steak at LG's Steakhouse.

Every time we go somewhere, the boys always have such a good time that they insist that we HAVE to go back again REALLY SOON. We take this with a grain of salt, because vacation is fun. But there's something about the desert that it's just a given - Of COURSE you are going to go back soon. Because it's the desert, and that's what we do, year after year.

These girls

We LOVE these girls. Did I mention that we love these girls?

We are basically a boy-driven house, so when girls enter the picture it's a whole new ball game. Fashion. Nail polish. Taylor Swift. But somehow when it's coming from Helena and Antonia, they mix it in with their own brand of tomboy-ish-ness and it's cool - even fun - for the boys.

In fact, even though Antonia is just on the cusp of teenager-hood, she's still happy to mix it up with the rest of them...and she has earned Luke's ongoing admiration as an all-knowing arbiter of music and tween trends.

Now answer this question: If these four went down to the beach, fully clothed, without towels, which two do you think would be most likely to run in the water without abandon and get completely soaked from head to toe?

If you answered Zach and Helena, of course you are right. These two are living life without a care in the world, and loving every sopping wet minute of it.

On Sunday we brought our whole motley crew (plus Elizabeth, plus Luke's buddy Sean) up to the cliffside rocky beach for some hiking and exploring. True, it wasn't quite up to par with Julie and Eric's traditionally hard-core hikes. And true, Sean's survivalist gear was just a little bit more than we needed for this particular adventure. Nevertheless, a good time was still had by all - and at the very end we were rewarded with some dolphin sightings just off the coast.

Sunday night Elizabeth served us dinner on her pretty beachside patio. We also got treated to a concert from our young musicians...ranging from just a few notes on the trumpet (Luke) to a simple melody on the clarinet (Helena) to a full-blown concert-worthy flute recital from Antonia.

Monday the bigger kids went to the rock climbing gym (Luke's new favorite activity, which the girls were only too happy to join in) while Zach went to a birthday party. By the late afternoon we were all back together and the group unanimously voted to head back to the beach - albeit this time stocked with towels and swim suits.

Can you make out these four tiny blips in the water? They're all in there, happy as clams. My main wish for these four is that they continue to love their time together.

Guy Fawkes Day

I'm late for Halloween but let's just pretend we dressed up for Guy Fawkes Day instead (or at least Dave did).

How would you feel about running into this guy on the road?

Rocky road

One of my volunteer jobs at school is to be the Monday reading companion in Zach's class. Each kid takes a turn and comes and read a book aloud to me. It's great practice for the kid and it's great fun to me to hang out with each kid individually. There's a whole range of reading skills in the class, and Zach is probably among the most proficient. But I have to tell you what is different about Zach. While all of the other kids can read the words, and some can put some expression into the words, there's no one who reads with quite as much...relish as Zach. As he sits down with this enormous grin on his face, he's got so much anticipation it's like he's preparing to eat an enormous feast. He reads well enough, but what sets him apart is just how much he is absolutely loving the story itself. And to me that's the beauty of reading - it's not just that he's technically capable, it's that he really, truly enjoys it.

This week's book was some kind of silly cat story, and by the time it was his turn to read, he couldn't wait to tell me about it. We read a few pages with him cracking himself up along the way, and then he stopped so he could turn to a different chapter and read me a part that he thought was especially funny. He was practically falling off the chair he was laughing so hard while he was reading it. Maybe it's just being with his mom. Maybe he was especially silly that day. But I can tell you at least for that day, there was no single kid in the class that got as much of a kick out of their book as Zach did.

Luke is, for lack of a better word, a classic tween. Every day is an adventure in grappling with big-kid emotions and anxieties, while savoring the little-kid joys. He loves playing soccer, but he's frustrated with himself for not having scored a goal yet. He's gone to some Dodger playoff games with Dave, and the teacher complimented him for how maturely he handled his homework on those nights. Yet on another day he completely forgot about a social studies test he had so he never studied for it...and still got an A-. He's fascinated by Bear Grylls and is counting the days until we can go camping. He's frustrated by a report he has to do on Palm Springs. He's laughing his head off at funny Family Feud bloopers. He's obsessed with getting a "six-pack" so he does 100 situps every morning and night. He sails through his 4:30 swim lesson and then begins a steady downhill slide as we work our way home, so that by 6:00 as dinner is ready, he's pale and listless from lack of food. He's growing in leaps and bounds right before our eyes.

There are two very distinct kid personalities in our house, and many days I wonder how they can ever coexist peacefully. To be honest, most of the time they don't. But every now and then we find the right thing to get them both happy and sharing the same cause. More often than not, the answer is rocks.

That's right, rocks. Cranky kids? Fighting kids? Take them to a rocky beach and all troubles are forgotten. For as long as they last, we will be grateful for those simple joys.

Just one friend

"Luke, do you ever see Zach on the playground at lunch?"
Luke pauses over his snack. "Yeah. He's in a gang."
"A gang?!?"
"Yeah. It's kind of like a hippie gang."
"A hippie gang?!?"
"Right. It's a bunch of long-haired kids. They all hang out behind a bush and sing songs like 'It's a Small World' and throw stuff at people."

After checking in with Zach and a few well-placed sources, I learn that only about 60 percent of this story is true. True: hanging with some other kids who all happen to have long-ish hair. True: playing behind bushes. Possibly true: Throwing a Frisbee at Luke and his friends. False: "It's a Small World."

But I'm not worried about the gang thing. Do you know how happy it makes me to hear that he might have a gang? It's as if all of the things we've been working on are coming together. Here is a guy who so desperately wants to make connections with other kids, and now he's actually got more than one friend. This is brilliant.

But as they say, all you really need is just one friend. Yesterday Zach had a play date with his current BFF, Enzo. This morning when he arrived at school, Enzo happened to come up right behind him. Enzo whispered something in his ear and said, "Come on, Zach!" and grabbed his hand and led him down to the playground. They were off without even a glance backwards. It's like, I don't know...having a regular kid?

Luke is lucky; he's always had tons of friends. But even so, some days can be a little challenging. Yesterday he hung out at the playground after school with a handful of buddies. Eventually, the boys all decided to play football, which Luke hates. Luke sat down to me and leaned his head on my shoulder. "I think I'm basically ready to go."

But before we could get up, Luke's pal Shane wandered over. Shane was Luke's best friend in kindergarten and now, even though they've gotten into different things and each have their own group of friends, they're like brothers - in a good way. They've always got each other's back.

"Hey Luke. You wanna go climb that tree with me?"
"Sure."

I watch them walk away and try to imagine them as the kindergarteners they once were, except now they've both got long legs and a distinctly pre-teen saunter. They're so wrapped up in conversation they don't even notice they're walking in perfect lockstep. And then one of them says something that cracks the other up and they're doubled over in laughter. Once they reach the tree, they're up, up, up...and gone.

Just one good friend.

Fanfare

School is in, and we are all struggling to get our routine straight. Example: On the past three Thursdays, our school has had three different dismissal times. No one is quite sure yet when we are supposed to be where. Exacerbating that issue is the fact that our weekends are no longer special times for relaxation; we have been gone and/or busy for 7 out of the last 8 weekends. We are loving all of the adventures that life throws our way, but we don't yet have much of a routine down.

Zach has a complex web of support at school and at home, and he is thriving with all of the attention, and loving first grade. Of course it helps that he is always positive, super-confident, and extremely outgoing. (On the day before school started, he walked right up to the principal, greeted her by name, and gave her a blow-by-blow description of all of our vacations.) Some social interactions are still a little rocky, but he has a few nice new friends, and of course academically he is rising straight to the top. I think it also helps that he is somewhat (I can't believe I am saying this) tall for his age. He had a playdate the other day with a kid who had turned 7 in June, and the boy's mother simply could not believe that Zach wasn't going to turn 7 until next April.

Watching videos with the cat

Luke is having a little roller coaster ride at school - some days he loves it, and some days he hates it. But in general it is a much better year than last year, and we've seen Happy Luke more days than we've seen Sad Luke. Did anyone know he is playing trumpet this year? He's managed to get a few notes out so far, and I think it's only a matter of time before he can serenade us all.

Most people know that I spent the summer in emotional turmoil over the fact that Luke decided to play soccer this year. My issue was that most of the soccer-playing kids spend their summers and off-seasons doing soccer camp and club teams, and I hated the thought of him getting out there after not playing for a year and being at the bottom of the heap. Man, was I wrong. He LOVES it. Loves, loves, loves it. He might not be the best player on the field, but he is out there having the time of his life, and after every game it is hard for him to contain his enthusiasm. "I LOVE this game!" True story: At one of his games the other day he played goalie and one of the shots got right past him and the other team scored. One of the dads on our team yelled out, "It's alright, Luke! With your good looks, you're gonna be a star no matter what!"

Dave is carrying on and working as hard as ever to develop his growing little business. After more than a year of serving clients, we've noticed a trend: The people who love his blog and turn to him because they trust him entirely, seem to be mostly...engineers. He just completed one transaction with perhaps the most difficult client in history (software engineer), and Dave seemed to be the only agent in town who a) understood this guy and b) was able to endure all of his quirks of character throughout the course of the escrow process. Believe it or not, he has more engineer types lined up to work with him. I have to laugh... but truly, anyone who loves and appreciates Dave is OK in my book.

Last week, following parents' night at school, Dave and I took advantage of the all-adult crowd to celebrate my birthday and the start of the school year with a few friends at our local wine bar. Not much more to say on that for now, except that it was absolutely perfect evening and it was a joy to be able to ring in the "new year" with Dave.

Now for the really cool part. I've spent many days, weeks, and months building my blogs and my social media presence. When I applied to be a social media ambassador for Terranea, I thought it was a shot in the dark. When they picked me as one of the top 10 finalists to experience an all-expense-paid weekend, I was completely shocked and humbled. And when I learned about my competition among the top 10, I thought, "I don't have a prayer in the world."

But they put us to work over that weekend, and I worked non-stop, from morning until night, trying to create as impressive an impact as possible. Here's just a sampling of what I did on Saturday: Got a wardrobe makeover, took a yoga class, swam and went down the water slide, hiked four miles, learned about falconry, toured the residential sale properties, watched golf videos, and ate at four restaurants. I was so bone-tired on Saturday night I literally fell asleep at 8:00 pm, only to force myself to wake up again at 10 pm because I wanted to finish a blog post before morning.

All in a day's work

 By Sunday morning, I was positively morose. I wanted to win so badly, but I was exhausted, and I knew I had no chance of winning. Then they made the announcement, and I shuffled back to the room to talk to Dave and the boys. With a long face and a heavy sigh, I told them, "Well, I worked really hard, so that's why it's hard for me to say....I WON!!!!!!!!!"

Total joy, bedlam, and jumping up and down ensued.

I am now proud to be a social media ambassador for Terranea for 2014, which essentially means that I have unlimited free stays there as long as I continue to write and share my experiences. 2014, you'd better be ready for us!