Vegetable Alien

You know, I was all set to write a monologue on spoons this evening, only to find out that - d'oh! - it's been done. So, it looks like it's gonna be vegetables instead.

This morning Juana and the boys and I went on a tour of a farm, under the guise of "pick your own" watermelon. But here's the difference between a canned farm tour versus a "real" pick-your-own experience: On today's farm tour, we were allowed to walk up and down the rows of watermelon plants and admire them in a non-touching way; then we were shuffled over to where a little pile of watermelons had already been picked, and we got to "pick" our own watermelon from out of the pile. A little cheesy, no? And for this we paid $13 a head?

But it wasn't all a complete waste of time. While we rode in the tractor up and down the fields, the farmhands kept plying us with large handfuls of fresh-picked produce. Of course I expected Zach to partake, but it was a complete - and I mean complete - surprise to see Luke gamely sampling radishes, cilantro, tomatoes, carrots, cucumbers, and green onions when they were passed around. We went to the little farm stand after the tour and Luke insisted that we buy some more green onions. Did you think I would have said no? The funny thing was that I asked him whether he wanted to eat them plain again, or whether I should chop them up and put them on something, and his response was, "Why not both?" It was weird, almost as if a little vegetable alien had done a mind-control job on our five-year-old. Possibly they put something in the soil.

Zach was, surprisingly, a little harder to please. This particular farm tour involved a lot of sitting on the tractor and listening (as opposed to running wild up and down the rows of plantings) and after a certain point, he began announcing repeatedly, "I'm all done with the tractor! I'm all done with the tractor!" while trying to climb off. Of course he was fully enthused with the watermelon sampling, and by the end his pure white t-shirt was a more or less even shade of pink, with dirt streaks up the sides. While Luke and I shopped at the farm stand, Zach ran around a little maze of strawberry plants, and even though I'm almost sure they were not there for the eating, Zach consumed quite his fair share... I'm even thinking it might have been as much as $13 worth.

Sunday is race day!

Another Visit to Krakatoa

It's stupid, and true; I am pretty sure I broke a toe - my second toe-break in two years (albeit a different toe). I am so mad at myself for this happening two weeks before the big race. It happened just as I finished a great ocean swim with some buddies. I was coming into the shore, I started to push off from the bottom just as I got knocked by a wave from behind, and somehow I jammed my second toe into the sand at an odd angle.

I went to the doctor today and he checked it out from every angle to make sure no other bones were involved, and he declared that it was probably a hairline fracture. However, he (sensibly) declined to order an x-ray because the treatment would be the same whether it was broken or not and he'd rather not see me waste the money or get the extra radiation. Now I just have to stay off it as much as possible (haha! joke! after I've been up and down the stairs 17 times today already!) and give it some rest before the big race.

Luke is in a new camp this week and I'm thrilled to see him settling right in with new teachers and new surroundings (fortunately a lot of his friends are in this camp too, so he's not alone). When Zach and I picked him up today, we hung around the playground with a new friend of his from class and the two of them got busy almost immediately playing "Star Wars" (which is funny to me, because neither of them appears to have any idea what they're talking about, but they have all the right lingo).

Luke also told me that he tried celery at camp today and he decided that he kind of likes it. My new favorite camp! My tolerance for picky eaters is pretty low, and Luke seems to be among the pickiest. I'm glad he found a new food that he likes because he's eliminated almost all the rest. For meal options we're now down to peanut butter and jelly, plain spaghetti, hot dogs (but only certain kinds of hot dogs), pizza (but only certain kinds of pizza), and Wahoo's chicken and rice and beans (but only chicken and rice and beans from Wahoo's, nowhere else). I try to console myself with the fact that Joe used to be a picky eater, and now he eats everything, including stuff that I won't even sit in the same room with. Apparently Dave used to be super-picky as a kid too, and he's much better now, but his "will-not-eat" list still includes foods that I consider necessities: eggs, tomatoes, mushrooms, broccoli, and shrimp. Mmmmm. Now I'm getting hungry.

Zach is in the refrigerator all the time but I'm not worried about him eating too much; if anything he's on the bodybuilder's diet. His go-to food is hard-boiled eggs, and he only eats the egg whites, so he's kind of like a lean protein machine. In fact, he has the strongest mid-section of any child I've ever seen. It's evident when he goes to the playground and hangs from a bar and just holds his legs straight out in mid-air for minutes at a time. It's also evident when you try to force him to do something he doesn't want to do, like get his hair cut. ("This kid is stronger than a bull," declared our hair-cutter, Linda, which Dave loved to hear because he is convinced that Zach is a classic Taurus.)

One of my favorite Zach-isms is when we're at the beach and he sees one of the advertising planes. He'll point to it and say, "There's a plane...pulling a sign!" The other day he looked up in the sky and saw a small prop plane and said, "There's a plane... pulling a sign... without a sign!" This morning Luke and I decided to help him make a little sign to tie to the back of his toy plane. Luke contributed the artwork: a little drawing of a beer bottle, and the words, "The Good Time Lime." Ah, summertime.

What's Mine is Yours

Here I am, exiting from the ocean after my swim "test" today (I'm in the middle, in case that's not immediately clear). Now that I've passed the test, I'm clear to swim the ocean race in two weeks, providing I don't chicken out or otherwise fail to pull it together that morning. I've heard the adage, "Do something that scares you every day," and I hope that's a good thing because I am definitely challenging my comfort zone on a regular basis. Not in a bad way like I'm doing something stupid, just in the sense that I have a healthy respect for the ocean (and a fear of being the last one to finish). Getting into the water is like a big rush of cold and nerves... and then suddenly it feels good, and when it's all over it's exhilarating. You can't really replicate that in a pool.

There is so much going on with Zach right now I don't really know how to package it all. These days he will climb up just about anything, hang from it, and then jump off whenever possible. He loves getting into the refrigerator, for example, and pulling out any kind of food that might interest him. Yesterday I managed to get there just as he had pulled down a whole carton of eggs (but before they broke). He's also sporting a big scrape down the side of his face, which he got from jumping, or possibly falling, off the top of the couch onto the train table (and before you call Social Services, yes, Dave and I were both home at the time, both trying to stop him from doing it).

He also has this funny thing where he hasn't really figured out "mine" versus "yours." Last night he wanted to put a band-aid on the scrape on his face... and when he woke up this morning, he stumbled out of his room and announced, "I have a band-aid... on... your face." My favorite was the other day when he was playing at the fountain, got completely soaked from head to toe, walked over to me, and announced, "I wanna... take off... your pants."

Luke is continuing his obsession with Legos and his all-encompassing need for more Lego sets. "Mom, look," he explained to me the other day. "It's like this: You like jewelry, and I like Legos." He knows that Dave gets mad when he keeps asking for Legos, so he's started speaking in code around the house. "Can we go buy some Ls?" Yesterday he was feeling particularly magnanimous after beach camp, when he struck up a conversation with Dave: "Dad, I have a really good idea. Should we go and get everyone some suprises? We can get Mommy some jewels or some new clothes, we can get Zach a really cool toy, and you can get something you like. How does that sound, Dad?" Hmmm, and he never mentioned himself. Whatta guy.

Countdown to the East Coast: 16 days.

Loosening Up

"Mom, my tooth hurts," Luke said to me yesterday. My first instinct was to give him the old "Sure honey, whatever" response, but then, remembering the tooth abscess debacle, I thought twice about it and decided to check it out. It was his front bottom tooth, which upon inspection was listing to the right. I touched it, wobbled it, and confirmed that it was... a loose tooth!!!!! Luke and I danced around the room with excitement. Then we went to Google Images to search for pictures of what the Tooth Fairy looks like. (Hey, this is the 21st century, what are you gonna do?). Of course I loved it when Luke thought about the prospect of a new tooth growing in and asked me, "When is my new tooth gonna hatch?" (Related follow-up question: "Mom, is the tooth fairy pretend like Cupid, or real like God?" Ummm....)

This afternoon Luke is off for his first day at beach camp. I'm sitting here silently fretting and hoping that he'll have a good enough time that he'll want to go back. It's kinda hot today, and he already had a long morning at school, and beach camp lasts for three and a half hours, and yadda yadda yadda mom-worry. As I walked him there this afternoon I was trying to explain what it would be like, but I must have overcompensated because he finally said, "Mom. Please. Stop. TALKING!"

Luckily he is with two little friends so he's not completely with a bunch of strangers. But still, I shed a little tear when I dropped him off. I've been sending him to the same school since he was two but this is different. It's really camp! With counselors! And big kids! ("Are there going to be bullies?" Luke wanted to know.)

Now here's the really weird thing: I'm at home while Zach is taking his nap, Luke is off at beach camp, and Dave is at work, and we're all within a seven-block radius of one another. Luke's beach camp is just a block from Dave's office. So when Dave walked back down to his office after lunch, he sneaked onto the sand to peek at the beach camp goings-on, snapped a little picture and reported back to me that Luke seems just fine.

Apropos of nothing, but it's just making me laugh: This morning Luke asked us, "Was anyone killed while they were building our house?" Um...No, not that we know of.

Late afternoon update: I picked Luke up and the first words out of his mouth were, "That was SUPER-FUN!!!" ... and later he added, "It was funner than fun!!!" Turns out he was a little scared to get in the water, so one of the guy counselors named "Brint" (Brent?) went in with him and soon had him cracking up and playing games in the water. Luke also came up with the name for his group (the Water Slides) that the campers voted as their favorite. So there you have it. Best possible first day of camp.

It's weird that I have so much to say about Luke when in fact I spent most of my time with Zach today. Suffice to say that he's become articulate in a very precise way. He'll spend a full minute trying to string together exactly the right sentence. "There's... a ... baby ... bird ... walking ... on ... the ... dirt ... on ... the ... ground." Often we'll be waiting in suspense for the last word. "I want a... a ... one ... I want a ... a one ... I want a ... a egg."

I always think it's funny that the boys (all kids?) get their b's and v's mixed up (Luke still calls our balcony the "valcony."). Zach is obsessed with "ruvver" bands because he thinks they can be turned into balloons. He'll hand me a rubber band and say, "Make a balloon." Then, after I've told him again and again, he'll walk around muttering, "Ruvver band doesn't make... a balloon."

At the moment I have this little landscaping redesign fantasy for our house, and it involves re-doing the front yard with drought-resistant native plants. I'm obsessed with the front lawn of some neighbors of ours who have perfectly tended white-gold beach grass that sways in every breeze. When I look at it, I think of Zach's hair when he's running somewhere or on the swing. His hair is nearly white, and it's super-fine, and it just kind of blows and swooshes in the air in whatever direction he's moving. I know if we had it in our front yard I would think of Zach and it would make me smile every time I saw it.

Summer Games

OK, is everyone ready to talk about something other than nursing? I thought so. The last few weeks or so have been miserable for all of us, but Zach is finally easing back into his normal life as a happy, cuddly kid who sleeps for a somewhat reasonable amount of time every night. Here he is, walking with the flag on the Fourth of July, and clearly reverting to his old self because he's preparing to just walk away without considering whether anyone is going with him or not (a trait of his that's especially unfortunate in large, open public spaces).

The big news for me is that I've gotten more serious about training for an ocean swim race at the beginning of August. I've put in many hours at the pool, but of course that's literally miles away from what it's really like to swim in the ocean. So on Sunday morning I took the plunge and went down for an ocean swim with a triathlete group that trains at the beach every week. The best part was that I met a swimming buddy, a woman named Sarah who is - get this - a NICU nurse and a lactation consultant! My hero! She was a little bit slower than me, but that was totally fine because it gave me a chance to get my bearings and build more confidence in the ocean. I'm going to take a little ocean swim class on Saturday morning, and then go back for another swim with the group on Sunday. "I wish I had more experience swimming in the ocean," I was complaining to Dave the other day. He fixed a glance at me and said, "Well, you have two choices: You can either take one of those 'experience pills' or just go out there and get more experience." Yeah. That's what it's like around here.

I took Luke and Zach over to the school yesterday to ride bikes, primarily because Luke hasn't been on a bike in about eight months and it's pretty embarrassing that I'm not even giving him an opportunity to learn. He had a good time for about, oh, three minutes, until he decided that it was more interesting to get down off the bike and study the machinery involved in the wheels and gears. (Zach, on the other hand, was completely nonplussed by the tricycle, and climbed onto Luke's bike, saying, "I wanna ride a bike! I wanna ride a bike!")

This summer, Luke is busy reading up a storm. Having finished the Captain Underpants and Ricky Ricotta series, he's now working his way through the Franny K. Stein (the mad scientist girl) books, and a book on science experiments. He's also in love with a new TV show called Special Agent Oso - a Disney-fied James Bond knockoff about a bear. We even pulled out the walkie-talkies yesterday to create the right ambience for some important Oso-type missions we needed to carry out (watering the plants, making dinner, etc.). Oh, and Luke is filled with questions as usual ("Mom, is God real or pretend?") and blessed with charm to spare: The other day we were in a shop and Luke started chatting with the young female shopkeeper. "You are so CUTE!" she finally told him. "Yeah, I know," he replied, "but you're a little old for me."

Zach, by the way, completely idolizes Luke. He'll gladly hold his hand wherever they're walking, he wants to wear Luke's shirts and shoes, and he imitates just about everything Luke says. Given that Luke spends a lot of time talking about his alter ego, Robo-Justice, it's not too surprising that Zach talks about him too. "This is... a Robo-Justice... car," Zach will announce, before sending a racecar down the track. I also think Zach might be just about the only two-year-old in town who, just before heading down the slide, shouts, "Jet pack: Activated!"

Oh, and when it comes to giving guilt trips, Zach has apparently learned from the master. Yesterday he saw me on my computer, checking my email, and he gave me what was perhaps my strongest motivation ever to stop what I was doing. "Mommy, you close...the computer...now...please." Gulp. Guess I'd better wrap this up.

Done

Fair warning: If you're uncomfortable discussing breastfeeding, don't read on. Lots of other things to surf on the web.

So Zach is now officially weaned. The whole process was painful, and Zach was pretty despondent for a few weeks, but it was time for both of us to move on. I realized that I've spent nearly 4 1/2 out of the last 5 1/2 years nursing, and although it's been the sweetest thing I can imagine, I've done my time.

The last few months have been strange for me because I've been assigned to write about breastfeeding issues at the same time I'm going through them. At times it's been hard to sort the universal issues from the personal ones. For instance, last month I was asked to write about the "breastfeeding backlash" - which, in a nutshell, is a backlash against the holier-than-thou breast-is-best preach-ifying that goes on among moms. But, as I told my editor, I really struggled with it, because I don't want to speak for anyone else about what is right for them, but for me it really was the very best thing.

With Luke, the first week was probably one of the most difficult of my life, and the first three months were unbelievably grueling. But we were lucky enough to have good resources and encouragement to keep us going. Once we eased into a routine, it got kind of nice, and once we got past the first year it was too sweet and comforting to stop.

If I hadn't had such a good experience with Luke, I probably wouldn't have tried so hard with Zach. But from the very beginning I was doggedly determined to make it work, even though I knew that when he was born he was heading straight to the NICU and would be bottle-fed. After I came home from the hospital I dragged myself out of bed twice a night to pump and get a good round-the-clock supply going. Once again, I was lucky to have great assistance and encouragement. By the time Zach came home, he decided that he preferred me to a bottle, and he never looked back.

In our neck of the woods, it is definitely de rigueur to nurse for a full year, as the AAP recommends. Quit before the first year without a valid excuse (I'm being sarcastic here, of course), and you might get the old judgmental eye-roll from other moms. But on the flip side, hardly anyone continues nursing beyond a year. I'm one of the very few among people I know in the area who has gone past age two. (Paradoxically, all of my closest friends from college breast-fed their little ones past age two and beyond - whatta bunch of hippies!)

When it was time to wean Luke, I bribed him for the first two days with cake, then with banana bread, and then after a few days it was a non-issue. With Zach, it dragged out a lot longer and he took it much harder. (He was completely unimpressed with the cupcake I offered him.) For the last few weeks he's had an obsession with round comfort objects: Our house is filled with balloons and he's been eating hard-boiled eggs all day long. He's also been wandering the halls in the wee morning hours looking for me. It's only been in the last four days or so that he's kind of eased up and stopped mentioning it. I think he's almost finished with his grieving process, but he still seems to need lots of physical comfort.

Balloons, eggs....Why am I even writing about this at all, you might ask? I think I just want to have this down on record for when I look back on it some day, and to validate how important it was for me and the boys at this very early stage of their lives. There are times (specifically 1 am, 2 am, 3 am, 4 am, and 5 am) when it was a huge pain and I swore I would quit right then. But in the end, the sweetness won out, and I'm glad that is the part that I will remember: snuggling close with a little baby; big eyes looking up at me; my body flooded with feel-good hormones. All in all, I'm glad that we had the time we did together -- and it's hard to imagine a better start for a great relationship.

Buzz

After our super-big party last night, Dave kept saying to me, "You still have your glow...Keep enjoying your glow!" I know there is a post-party glow that happens, especially after an enormously successful beach party, but I also just learned that there's a new Jennifer Lopez perfume out called "Glow." So now I'm starting to think that I'd like to refer to it as more of a "buzz." (Until Lindsay Lohan or Courtney Love comes out with a perfume by that name.)

Two other moms and I organized this beach party for all of the families and teachers in Luke's graduating class, and we were thrilled to have more than 100 people show up, including at least 10 teachers. We also lucked out with weather - sunny and warm - and with hermit crab season offering plentiful little beach crabs for the kids to collect and admire. We went through 17 pizzas and who knows how many bowls of fruit, drinks, cookies, and cupcakes. By the end of the party I knew it was a success because someone (Luke) threw up. (In fairness, it was after dinner, dessert, hours of running around, and one of his friends had tossed a shovel-ful of sand that landed right in his mouth, so it had to come back up.)

Luckily Dave kept an eye on Zach (who made at least 30 trips to the dessert table, but what are you gonna do?) so that I could spend time chatting with other grownups. It was so much fun that I felt a little sad that we hadn't spent more time together during all of these years of preschool... Often we're just ships passing during pickup and dropoff times. But we've got lots of playdates and special trips planned for summer vacation, so we're just going to try to maintain these friendships while we can, until kindergarten starts and we all go in our different directions. Tonight, for example, we met three of the other families for a concert in the park, and while the kids ran around playing detective, we drank wine, did the chicken dance, and enjoyed the buzz while it lasted.

Pomp and Circumstance

It's official: Luke is now a pre-K graduate. We had all of the festivities last night, and what a trip it was. Uncle Bill was the event photographer, and we are eagerly awaiting his photos from the evening, but until then, you just have to deal with my amateurish snapshots and read a bunch of words.

The ceremony started with each of the kids marching up to the stage slowly (to "Pomp and Circumstance"); then they sang a few songs - one in Spanish, one with the sign language alphabet; and then they each came down from the rafters for a diploma. When the director handed out the diplomas, each kid had to say his or her name loudly into the microphone. It was kind of a blur to me, but this is how several people described it: Five or so kids went and spoke in a someone restrained manner, to polite applause; then Luke got up, and said his name so exuberantly that a cheer sort of rose up in the audience; and following that the kids and the families were much more animated and enthusiastic. (I know what you're thinking: Leave it to the kid's mom to somehow imagine that the graduation ceremony was all about her child.) After that we had a nice dinner with Suzi and Bill and friends, and everyone had a great time except for poor Zach who is having a rough week for a couple of different reasons including sickness and overtiredness.

People have been asking me, "Did it make you cry?" Well, I felt all melt-y and goosh-y inside but I didn't really cry - I was too entertained by the whole spectacle. But I'll tell you something much more real that almost made me cry today:

Zach loves trains, right? A few weeks ago I took Zach to the little mini-train ride in the mall near us, thinking he'd have a blast. As it turned out he was a little scared and didn't want to ride it without me (no parents allowed on the train). So today, Luke and Zach had off from school and (given that I had a bunch of unused tickets from a few weeks ago) I decided to bring them both to the train ride. Luke held Zach's hand, they walked in there together, and Luke sat next to Zach right up in front at the engine. As the train started up, Luke put his arm around Zach's shoulders and kept it there, protectively, while they went around the tracks. A minute or so into the ride, I saw Luke showing Zach how to push the red button to make the whistle blow; then they sat back again, with Luke's arm draped over his brother's shoulders. I would have given anything to have a camera, but then again, maybe I wouldn't have enjoyed the moment so much. I just loved seeing Luke, with his baseball cap on at a jaunty angle, looking like such a great big brother; and Zach, with his saucer-wide eyes, finally feeling safe enough to enjoy the ride. Now there's a tear-jerker for you.

Hamburger Rock

I'm extremely pleased to report that Dave declared yesterday as "The Best Father's Day Ever." And it was pretty darned good for me too. Dave took up the invitation of his good friend Paul (known to Luke as Friend Paul) to take the boys over to Dodger Stadium for a special Father's Day ball-playing opportunity down on the field. Dads were invited with their kids to toss a ball around on the grass, after which they all got free Dodger Dogs and ice cream. Good deal, right?

The best part was that the boys had a great time -- at one point sharing a feel-good moment of brotherly love -- and Dave came home calling it "even bigger and better than expected." Oh, and I got four hours of "free" time while they were gone. How do you like that?

After that we had a fun cookout/celebration with Dave's side of the family (including Uncle Jerry) in Long Beach. Zach kept himself busy shooting baskets, while Luke spent most of his time poring over the Lego catalog and deciding what to get next.

At one point Dave took Zach out in front and Zach stopped to admire a nice flat, round rock. Turns out that it was a rock that Dave spotted in a park when he was 10 or 11 at a camping/cookout adventure, and he was thoroughly amused that it looked like a hamburger, so he brought it home. "That's a...nice...rock," said Zach. "You're right!" said Dave, "That's the same thing I said when I first saw it 30 years ago!" So he promptly picked it up and packed it in the car to bring to our house. As Dave explained to me later, "For the past 30 years, every time I walk into my parent's house, I pass that rock and I think, 'Hey, there's my hamburger rock.' So I thought it would be a nice Father's Day thing to bring it to my house and share it with my own son." So if you walk into our front door and see a round rock, now you'll know why.

Final thought - Chances are Luke has been watching too much TV lately. This afternoon in the car he said to me (out of the blue), "You know Mom, if you or Dad have a heart attack, you should probably take some Lipitor."

Huh?

Next up on the docket: Pre-K graduation!

Party of One

That's me, in my usual position on my "perch," playing Scramble, as it turns out. When I expressed surprise to Dave that he had managed to snap a picture of me in this position, he said, "Well, I've only seen you like this about a thousand times." So there you have it, me in all of my glory.

For the past five years we've hosted joint half-birthday parties for Luke and his buddy Hatcher at the end of June. This year the invitation list was getting just too complicated, so Hatcher's mom Julie and I decided to put most of our energy into a graduation party for their pre-K class, and a very small amount of energy into a very small half-birthday party for the boys. So last night, Luke and Hatcher had four of their closest friends over for a special evening at their favorite ice cream parlor.

Anyone who has hung around with Luke knows which ice cream parlor I'm talking about, and you know that he's not really all that interested in the ice cream - he's there for the books. This picture of him is actually a shot from the middle of the party, when everyone else happened to be up from the chairs, and he was so engrossed in his book he sort of forgot that he was at a party.

Nevertheless, the whole thing was extremely cool. They gave us a "tour," which essentially had us walking into the back room to see the ice cream machine and they let the boys add the sprinkles to the Birthday Cake flavor ice cream (Luke's favorite, and perhaps not coincidentally, their most popular flavor). After that everyone got a little sample of the freshly made Birthday Cake (which I like better fresh, especially when made by a bunch of five- and six-year-olds).

Then - and this is the kicker - they brought out these giant bowls and everyone got to have any flavor ice cream they wanted, along with their choice of toppings and whipped cream. It was supposed to be all-you-can-eat but one bowl was literally all most of us could eat. Actually, I think Hatcher's dad Stu managed to have a second bowl, right after declaring that this was where he wanted to have his own birthday party.

For Father's Day, Luke and Zach and I sent Dave off to get a massage, and while he was gone, the three of us drove down to Carson to the meat market that has Dave's favorite carne asada. Somehow when Dave has adventures with the two boys he always comes home enthusing about what a great time they had and how good the boys were; and yet when I attempt to have an adventure with the boys, it always turns into a comical disaster. So picture us at this meat market (where we are the only people speaking English), jostling for position within a huge crowd at the meat counter. Zach spots a precarious pyramid of apples and wrestles his way out of my arms to grab one, which is annoying, but I figure if I give him one it'll keep him occupied. So I get him an apple, and he starts eating it, and then he starts doing this thing where he chews off a little piece of skin and then spits it out as far as he can. Picking up pieces of apple-skin from the ground, and trying to listen for our number to be called (in Spanish), I am mortified. In the meantime, Luke sees all of the deer heads mounted on the wall, and then notices one that is smaller and has no antlers. "Mom? Is that a fawn? Why did someone kill a baby fawn? Isn't that mean? Why would someone kill a fawn? Did they shoot it? Why would they shoot a baby?" and on and on. We finally get the meat and make it to the check-out counter, and I have no cash so I attempt to use my Visa. They must be using one of the old dial-phone systems because it takes another 10 minutes before the machine can process it. I start getting the eye-roll from the regulars. And just before we finally are finished, Zach decides it's time for a loud chorus of the one part of the Handy Manny song that he remembers: "Muy rapido! Muy rapido!"

Final postscript: On the way home, I told Luke that I don't like the idea of killing fawns either; and in fact I don't really like the idea of hunting at all. So he thought about this, and then said, "Mom, when we get home, we should look up "Duck and Deer Hunters" on the computer, and then email them, and tell them that it's not nice." My five-and-a-half-year-old. The crusader.

Happy Father's Day to all of the amazing men in our lives.

Man of the moment

Beneath his shy, I-only-want-mommy facade, Zach is quite the mischievous little imp. But the saving grace to his prankster personality is that he will loudly and gleefully announce whatever he is doing, especially if he knows that it is somehow "wrong." Examples from the last 48 hours include: "I'm taking off my diaper!" "I'm dumping the fish food!" and "I'm opening a lollipop!" to name a few. There are nights that he might balk at getting in the bathtub, but if he has an opportunity to get wet in, say, a fountain, he is first in line. Today after the farmers' market he got so completely soaked playing next to the little dog-statue fountain that I had to bring him home in just a diaper, socks, and shoes - with a huge grin on his face. (I later found out that the shoes and socks were completely soaked through as well). Once he realized he could take his diaper off, he wanted to go over to his little kid-potty. This gave him an opportunity to announce from the bathroom, "I'm sitting in the toilet!" (which sounds more alarming than it turned out to be).

The other day at the park, Zach overheard some older boys saying to their friend, "Go get the ball, dude!" and for some reason (I think it was the "dude") this had him doubled over with laughter. Now if you want to make him laugh, all you have to do is add "dude" to the end of the sentence. It'll just about send him over the edge.

Luke is in a quiet, serious mode these days, probably due in part to 1) his newfound interest in Legos ("Mom, when we went to the snowy mountains - was that before or after I was into Legos?") and 2) reading. Yesterday Luke brought a book over to me and read a passage very authoritatively (without any hesitation between words): "The most poisonous jellyfish is the Australian sea wasp. The largest jellyfish measures almost 7 feet across and has tentacles more than 200 feet long." After I scraped my jaw up off the floor, I was able to manage a "Great job, Luke!" Where did this come from?

Lest anyone think I'm bragging about Luke, I should follow it up by noting that he then went on to forget the book and leave it behind at My Gym, becoming the third item this week that he's left behind somewhere and we had to drive back to pick it up. Super-genius, maybe, but absent-minded professor for sure. Dude.

Hats Off

Today was the last t-ball game, or should I say love-fest in honor of Coach Dave. I guess I can't really say enough how beloved he is by all of the kids on the team (and their parents), although those of us who know him can certainly understand why. Throughout this season he has been totally dedicated, thoughtful, encouraging, lighthearted, fair, and approachable -- all the things you would want in your kid's t-ball coach. The kids are even talking about requesting to be together on Dave's team next year. I'm not surprised, really, but I'm extremely pleased to see him so happy and natural in a role -- and I'm tickled to see so many other people appreciate him for all that he does. One dad asked Dave how much time he spent on coach stuff each week, beyond the one hour practice and the one hour game. Dave thought about it and estimated that it was about another hour, but I know it's more than that. I've seen him poring over batting lineups and practice drills, and doing countless other things to get the kids more playing time and exposure to high-quality baseball. I'm especially glad that Dave's parents were able to be there to watch him in action today and see the team give him a nice thank-you gift after the game.

What's that? You're getting tired of me rattling on and on about Dave? Well here's one funny thing about the end of the season: Dave got an official league baseball for each kid and had them all autograph the balls for one another as an end-of-season present. But unbeknownst to him, the trophies that the boys got from the league turned out to be in the shape of a golden baseball glove - into which the ball fit perfectly. So each boy took home an autographed ball, nested neatly into the glove of the trophy.

What's that again? You're tired of me burying the lead? Oh yeah, Luke got his cast off yesterday. The x-rays show that the bone is still cracked but the doc was satisfied with all of the new bone tissue that had grown around it. Luke is not allowed to bike or skateboard for another week, but otherwise he's good to go. It was a real treat to see him get up to bat and play in the final game -- and even though his arm wasn't quite as strong as it was eight weeks ago, he still did a fine job and everyone in the stands was cheering for him.

Tonight we all (our little family, that is) went into the hot tub together for the first time in two months. We love being in the pool, but I guess it was just a little solidarity thing with Luke while he had his non-waterproof cast on that none of us went in the pool. But tonight we were more than ready to celebrate a cast-free lifestyle. Let the summer begin!

Spoke too soon

Yeah, yeah, we went on vacation, la, la, la. Hope everyone enjoyed the last little installment of what a great time we were having, because things have a way of turning quickly. Zach came down with a fever on Tuesday night, and was completely feverish and basket-case-y all day Wednesday. Add to this the fact that Luke was suffering from over-stimulation and sheer exhaustion. By the time Thursday rolled around, our collective parental nerves were fried (Ed: Where is the collective parental nerve, exactly?) and we were ready to do anything -- anything -- to pass the time until our 3:45 flight. A long aimless drive, a second trip to Target...Let's face it, we were more than ready to go home.

When we actually got home, however, everyone miraculously cheered up. A happy little reunion with familiar toys and beds seemed to do the trick. Now, as we get more time and space away from the actual vacation, I'm willing to gloss over the not-so-pretty parts and remember some more of the fun stuff:

-- A pajama-clad Zach, who adorably says, "butt-nin" instead of "button," running down the hall to the ice machine: "Push red butt-nin! Get ice!"

-- Luke, after reading a sign painted on the wall of the crab restaurant that says, "Free Crab Tomorrow" (a rip-off of the old bar joke "Free Beer Tomorrow"), waking up the next morning and saying, "Hey! Today's the free crab day!"

-- Sampling the pushing-the-limit Jelly Belly flavors, including "Toothpaste" and, yes, "Booger."

-- Pretending the big glass hotel elevator was a massive spaceship.

-- Going back for cereal again and again at breakfast just to use the cool cereal dispenser.

-- Chowing down on Chex mix and goldfish every night during the hotel happy hour.

-- Getting the kids all cleaned and polished for a "fancy" dinner at Dave's favorite Italian restaurant.

-- Having two movie nights (Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and I Love You, Man) with Dave after the kids went to bed.

OK, maybe it wasn't so bad after all...

Lucky

As we soak up every minute of vacation #2 within a week's span, I have to say how lucky I keep feeling. To have vacation time... to have discretionary spending money... to be able to stay in a nice hotel for five straight nights... to "call for" our car whenever we need it... Seems like we are truly living in the lap of luxury, at a time when I know many people are not. Things might be totally different in two months, when our income stream officially runs dry, but for now we're definitely enjoying our time. I had a real moment of reflection today after yet another day of special treats: We stopped off at the Target to get another little plane toy for Zach because he had left his at the minor league baseball game the other night... and suddenly I started thinking about how totally extravagant this vacation must seem to a lot of people. Buying more toys after losing the first toy while at a baseball game? Not to preach-ify, but seriously... I need to recognize that this lifestyle is somewhat extraordinary. (Not that it's stopped the kids from complaining at any given point, but still...).

What is there to do in Sacramento? How 'bout a quick laundry list of what we've done since we jetted in on Saturday? Minor league baseball, steam engine train ride, train museum, Lego store, carousel ride, Fairytale Town park, tour of the Capitol, tour of the Jelly Belly factory... and of course the requisite dining out, ice cream treats, and dips in the pool.

I'll start with Zach because he just continues to amaze me. He was completely transfixed at the train museum by the extensive display of Thomas trains and villages. He stayed there for about 90 minutes before nap, until we had to drag him away, and then another 90 minutes after nap. The funny thing is that even though he's extremely shy around strangers, something about the trains seemed to give him a boost of confidence. Without fail, every time a new person approached the train display, Zach would pick up a train, carry it up to that person, and declare, "Train!" as if to make sure that they knew why we were all there.

Another crazy thing was at Fairytale Town, a park that has sets re-enacting various fairy tales and nursery rhymes. There was a feature called, "The Crooked Mile," a long winding path through the trees that went up and around and twisted and turned every which way. It was not a full mile, obviously, but it was long enough that it took Zach a full 5 minutes to run through the course. So he ran it with Dave once, then again, then again... and then he kept running the course again and again. He ran it a total of 10 times, which was pretty astonishing considering he left Luke in the dust after about round three, and he had Dave pleading for mercy by the end.

Zach has a funny little speech pattern in which each sentence starts out LOUD and then fades to a whisper: "CAN I HAVE (some goldfish)" "HOORAY FOR (hot water pool)" and so on. Whenever we get into the rental car, Zach announces, "I LOVE (very fast car)" which is ironic because the car (a PT Cruiser knockoff made by Chevy) isn't all that fast or lovable.

Luke is suddenly obsessed with Legos, which is funny and sad, because if I'm honest, I can't stand Legos. I'm sure if he were an only child, and we had a big organized area of the house devoted exclusively to Legos, and they never got lost or swallowed or stuck up someone's nostrils (ahem), I'd think they were cool. But those kits with the tiny pieces that are so easily lost and so tempting to toddlers... they just make me crazy. Regardless, we treated Luke to a trip to the Lego store and he was in hog heaven, deciding whether he wanted to choose pirates or Star Wars or some kind of evil robot creature for his next creation.

Also, I am SO glad we took Luke to the Jelly Belly factory tour. When I saw the brochures, I was a little doubtful because I assumed it would be super-touristy and probably a little cheesy. And, sure, it was a little of both of those, but it was also extremely compelling. We had a great view of just about everything that was happening at each stage of the factory and Luke was absolutely enthralled by the robot-creatures that load up and sort all of the trays and beans. When you think about it, machines and candy sounds like just the kind of place that Luke would never want to leave (and he didn't).


Most little kids would probably yawn at the idea of a trip to the Capitol, and Luke probably was bored for the most part, but when we got up to the Senate chambers, I sat down next to him and gave him a little "pep" talk: "This is where you'll sit when you get elected to the California Senate," I told him, "and you'll get to make the rules for everyone in the whole state. And once you are elected governor, you'll sit up there in front of all of the senators. And when you get elected president of the United States, you'll be able to come back here and all of these senators will listen to you and you can tell them what kind of rules you want to make for the whole country." He seemed extremely pleased with this idea, and suddenly the Senate chambers got a whole lot more interesting.


As you can tell, this has been a fairly kid-oriented vacation. But one interesting thing about Dave on this trip is that he has seemed almost proud to show off "his" city. Even though the kids had just about had it by the end of the Capitol visit, he still wanted to show us his meeting spots, his favorite coffee shop, and his favorite diner. And of course he insisted that we pop in to his favorite sandwich place, where you order the sandwich and they make it in some mysterious place on the second floor, and when it's ready it comes sliding down through a special chute. Now who wouldn't love that? Luke sure did. What a lucky, lucky guy.

desert island

We're in the car right now, heading back on the seemingly interminable drive back from the desert. Luke is exhausted and cranky; Zach is picking up a second wind after demolishing nearly every morsel of food in sight at dinner. Some brief tidbits from the trip;

Zach, upon first walking into the massive lobby of the hotel/resort: "What...a nice...airport!"

Luke, after jumping into one of the hotel pools: "Let's pretend this is my house, and it's flooded, and all of these people are here for a big party!"

Tori Spelling, at our hotel pool: Nothing more to say on that, except she was there and we saw her.

Dave and I are looking at this trip as sort of a milestone in our family life: It's our first real trip without a "baby." Sure, we had a stroller but we barely used it, if only to have Zach push it himself. But we had two bed-sleeping kids who were both able to talk and express their (strong) opinions and preferences throughout the trip. (Pool- good. Application of sunscreen - bad. Tiny desert bunny rabbits seen roaming the grounds - good. Leaving - bad.)

We love renting a house in the desert and it's always much better at least to have separate sleeping quarters and a kitchen, but we may soon be in a position where this hotel is the kind of place we need to stay with kids. Think seven pools, ping-pong, foosball, a sixty-foot water slide, and (most important for Luke the Extrovert), new people to meet.

Did I mention the water slide? We didn't even go on it the first day but once Dave got Luke started, Zach had to go, and soon it was a family obsession. Of course Luke the cautious one would never go by himself, while Zach was ready to go without hesitation. (Luke's cast was never once an issue, by the way). But for Luke at least, whooshing down the little tube fueled countless superhero fantasies. More than once we'd come out of the water at the end and he'd be yelling, "Fight the crime! Fight the crime!"

Would anyone believe just how fierce and fearless Zach is? He is 30 pounds of solid muscle, as anyone who has seen him holding his legs straight out on the hanging bars will tell you). At the pool, he has no problem jumping straight into the water (yikes) and he practices willingly dunking himself and then popping his head up, saying, "Zach - water dog." He is not just ready to swim, he's ready to take off and leave the rest of us in the dust.

Looks like we're pulling into town so I'll stop for now. Time to unpack this mess of a car and put some lotion on our dry, parched skin.

"My name is Luke, and I am an addict." "Hi, Luke"

As of this week, we've essentially de-baby-fied the house. We gave away the glider and we sold the crib (on Craigslist, five inquiries within six hours). I'm happy to have two boys in beds, and apparently Zach is too. He's been defying all expectations by sleeping until 7 am or 7:30 every morning. The only little moment of sadness I had was when the young father came over to buy the crib from us, and I wished him luck and told him that we had many happy ... memories ... of ... and I got this big lump in my throat and started choking up. So embarrassing! And unexpected, because the truth is I don't have that many happy memories of babies in that crib. My crib memories run more along the lines of: 2 am, 3 am, 4 am, 5 am - PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go back to sleep. But the guy understood and I ducked out of there and let Dave handle all of the formalities.

On Saturday night we had the annual family campout on one of the local baseball fields next to a big park. Luke was in hog heaven because he had three little buddies to run around with and they were all carrying swords or light sabers and fighting off "bad guys" for most of the night. Zach and I enjoyed the dinner and time with our friends, then went home for a cozy night of sleep in our own beds, and then rejoined the motley crew in the morning. At 8:30 the fishing derby began and, after a quick tutorial on casting, Dave and Luke caught not one but two pond turtles. Then we all came home, muddy, cranky, and counting the days until next year's campout.

Today is election day here in California, which marks the culmination of Dave's first campaign as a solo operator. I don't want to speak too soon but at the moment it appears that his new company is a roaring success. Somehow he's managed to start his own new business, run a major statewide campaign, coach his kid's t-ball team, and be a great dad and husband every day. I don't know how he does it. The other day Dave had a meeting with a potential new client, and Luke wanted to know how the client knew to call Dave. "Does everyone in the world have your phone number?" he asked incredulously. Also, Dave and I had a good chuckle when Dave received a blind resume submission from a guy who wants to work in politics. The letter began, "I know that at your campaign group, you only hire the finest employees..." to which Dave, the sole employee, had to agree that the guy has a good point.

I have to confess that I am a little worried about money coming in after May, but we might have found a solution in Luke. I did a scratch-off lottery ticket with him a few months ago (bad mom! bad mom!) and he won, so he wanted to do another one, and he won, so now he wants to get one whenever we go to the store. The other day I got him a ticket along with a little speech about how you don't always win, and that's why it's a game, etc. etc. So he took the ticket along to a playdate and I kind of forgot about it until I joined him at our friends' house and the two moms that were there were puzzling over the ticket. "I don't know how to read these things - I can't tell if he won anything or not," said one mom. The winning numbers were 24 and 28, and his whole ticket was 24, 28, 24, 28, 24, 28, etc. Turns out he won fifty dollars! By my count he has won at least $75 so far this year. Now I will be totally to blame when he has to go to Gamblers Anonymous meetings by age 8.

And now for today's moment of zen: Zach and I are driving in the car after having dropped off the baby sitter at the train station. Zach is sitting quietly, until out of the blue he announces, "Some foods...are very...crunchy." Okay, then. Carry on.

Cast-away

Today was supposed to be the day that Luke became cast-free. But once they sawed off the old cast and did a new x-ray, it was readily apparent that fate had other plans. I was standing behind the x-ray monitor at the doctor's office and as soon as the image of his newly naked cast-less arm came up, I didn't even need the doctor to tell me that he was in for more cast time. One bone has healed but the other bone still has a fractured part sticking out that just needs more time to grow back together. On the bright side, his new cast is shorter (below the elbow) and waterproof (hooray for baths, pools and hot tubs!). (This pic is actually of his old cast - a nice shot from Bill taken at Zach's party).

Before we go feeling sorry for Luke, though, let's think about all of the special treats, packages, and attention he's gotten just by virtue of being a generally outgoing and well-liked kid. This morning as we stepped out the door, we were greeted by a little pack of Play-Doh with a get-well-soon note for "The Mayor of Morningside Drive," which is what our neighbors call Luke. (That's right; we were literally on our way to get the cast off, and he's still getting presents.) Then you should have seen him when he got back to school with his new neon-green cast. As soon as he stepped past the gate, he was instantly surrounded by five giddy girls all wanting to look at his arm. One of Luke's friend's moms was planning to pick Luke up from school tomorrow for a playdate and she decided that she was going to make it a "cast-off" party for Luke. Instead it'll have to be a re-cast party, or something like that. As long as it involves Wii and treats he'll probably be happy.

All of this is not to overshadow one of the biggest developments of the week, which is that Zach has now moved out of his crib into a big kid's bed. I know there are some kids (and I envy their parents) who just love their crib and sleep in the crib until age 3 or something, but Zach the climber clearly had other plans. So he's now sleeping in a bed identical to Luke's and -- who knew? -- for the last three mornings he has slept past 7 am. I mean, knock on wood and all, but this seems like it's working out alright. Naps are another story, but if we're not waking up at 5 am I'm not complaining about much (yes, my standards are that low).

Tonight as Dave was putting the two of them to bed, Zach was sitting up in his bed proudly declaring, "I does going to bed! I does going to bed!" This of course had Luke absolutely collapsing with giggles, until he was able to correct Zach and get him to say, "I am going to bed!" Once we figure out what to do with the crib and get it out of their room, they really will be just two kids, sleeping in a room together. So long, baby-hood! It was fun while it lasted, but now we're on to bigger and better things.

Mom's Day

I don't know what anyone else has planned for Sunday, but it sure would be hard to top today in terms of pure Mom-lovin' activities.

Both of the boys had Mother's Day teas at school so I did one first with Zach and then with Luke. Zach was a little ambivalent about his party (see exhibit A at left). Even though I told him it was a "Mommy party" and all of the mommies would be there, he still clung to me as if I might take off any second. They had a little song and a snack, and the main highlight for Zach was eating a chocolate muffin and pouring himself a glass of lemonade that was full up to HERE (apparently no one noticed him with the pitcher in hand, so he just went to town filling a cup for himself).

At Luke's class party, the kids sang three songs (You Are My Sunshine, Y-E-L-L-O-W Spells Yellow, and Mamma Mia). I'd like to pretend the songs were a surprise but Luke has been practicing them on me all week, so I kind of knew they were coming. The surprise that he had been nearly bursting to keep from me was a present that he made out of an Altoid tin. And I would have been surprised, too, had the mom sitting next to me during the songs not said, "...And I can't wait to see the jewelry boxes they made from the Altoid tins." Ooops.

But one of my favorite parts by far was the pictures that each of the kids drew of their moms. It was supposed to be an illustration of something that your mom likes to do. So Luke drew a picture of me -- wearing the dangle-y earrings that Dave gave me for our anniversary, which now seem to be emblematic for him of me being happy -- and it said, "My mommy is going to New Jersey to see her mom and dad." I am just fascinated and tickled that he sees me like that.

As I was lying here thinking more about the day, I was doing a little mental calculation: Turns out I am just about to reach the 2000-day mark of being a mom. Two thousand days -- and nights! How did I get this far? I think back on my first night of being a mom, in a hospital bed with Luke by my side, and not sleeping at all because I was just so awed and excited and nervous and confused. I was a completely different person then because at the time I didn't even know a fraction of what I know now, 2000 nights later. Just imagine how much more I have to learn.

Two Time's the Charm

We love birthdays around here; or at least I do, perhaps maybe a little bit too much (ahem). Anyway, since Grandma Bobbie and Granddad couldn't make Zach's party last week, we had a little celebration with them last night and Luke and I made brownies with chocolate frosting for the occasion. We had to frost them, of course, because what else are you going to lick off the candles if you don't have frosting?

Zach has so many quirky little sayings, it's hard to remember them all when it's time to sit down and write. (Like have I mentioned how he calls a car carrier a "car carrier- ier - ier - ier" and never seems to know when to stop?) But one funny thing about him talking so much is that 1) He can't get away with anything because he's constantly narrating ("Zach... going... downstairs") and 2) We know what he's been thinking about because he'll just pop out with random excerpts from his day. Like he'll be playing with his toys and he'll randomly say, "No, Cruz... don't eat goldfish. Those ... Zach's goldfish" (and I can surmise that his buddy Cruz was trying to pilfer some of Zach's lunch at school). Or he'll walk around muttering, "Rice and beans... then cake," as if to remind himself that he has to eat his dinner first. The other day in the middle of dinner, he stopped to say, "What happened... to heater?" -- which reminded me to tell Dave that Felipe had turned the heater around when he cleaned the boys' room, and apparently it had been bugging Zach all day. Zach later tagged along to watch Dave fix it, and he's been saying, "Daddy fix it... the heater," ever since.

Over to Luke for a minute: One of his favorite pastimes is drawing comic books, and his main hero is his alter ego, Robo-Justice. He's becoming quite handy at drawing Robo-Justice with his left hand, too. Usually while Zach is napping in the afternoons, Luke will dictate the plot to me, I'll write the bulk of the story, and then Luke will add the pictures.

Last night Zach was being super-cranky at bedtime and Dave called him "Crank-o-tronic," which of course captured Luke's fancy. So today he decided to draw the "Crank-o-tronic 800" and me (Mom). But what's that thing hanging down underneath my face? "Oh - it's your tummy, Mom." Sheesh. The nice thing is he made a point of drawing me with the special earrings that Dave got me for our anniversary.

My problem (just one? hahahaha) is that even though he can be a huge pain sometimes, I can't help falling in love with Luke over and over again. Like yesterday afternoon when we we making the brownies: He picked up the spoon to stir the batter, and out of the blue, he sang, "If I knew you were comin' I'd have baked a cake...How'dya do, how'dya do, how'dya do." I love that song because it reminds me of Grandma P., and it's so funny to hear it come out of such a little person. Somewhere I know she's smiling.

Post Partum

What? It means "after the party," right? Oh. Never mind.

So anyway, it's clear that I should not be the one selecting toys for the kids, because everything that Zach got for his birthday is way cooler than anything I have ever picked out for him in the past. He got such cool stuff that he and Luke have been fighting about it all week.

Example: Daniel and Eitan got him a Handy Manny toolbox, and when you push a button in the front, all of the tools bounce up and down and sing their little song. It would never have occurred to me to get one, but Zach and Luke are absolutely obsessed with it.


Then there's a little green Escalade from Suzi and Bill that pulls a horse trailer. When you push a button on the top of the Escalade, it plays a few bars of music with a country twang. Again - Zach is obsessed with it.

And don't even get me started on the tiny stuffed Dalmatian puppy from Janeen and Michael and Gavin. Luke and Zach are both crazy about him, and I actually had to take it away from them yesterday because they were both pulling on it and I was afraid they were going to rip it in half. Yes, it's technically Zach's, but I think they are going to take turns sleeping with it at night.

But it's a good little change of pace for them to have some new things to keep them occupied around the house. We need all of the distractions we can get while Dave is out and about, in the home stretch of election season, and while Luke is barred from the beach and swimming with his cast. So we're basically biding our time while we count down until May 19 and then life gets normal again. Right? Right?