A hurdle cleared

Does anyone know how much Luke has been dreading his 2nd grade class play? Last year, when he was still in 1st grade, he was declaring how much he did not want to be in this particular play (BeBop with Aesop). Over the summer, when anyone would ask him if he was excited about 2nd grade, he would mention that he didn't want to be in the play. Throughout the school year, whenever the topic of the play would come up, he would ask if we could be on vacation that week. In his mind, it was THAT bad.

So of course the play came, and he was miserable about it, but he did it and he did just great. He delivered all of his lines perfectly as Villager 1 (in a skit aboutThe Boy Who Cried Wolf). And even though, in the moments leading up to his cue, he looked as if he was about to throw up, he made it through. Happily, he has two of the most understanding and supportive teachers in history, and they were with him right through it - up until the celebration at the end, where they told him his performance was a "personal triumph." Here he is, after the play, looking as if he dodged a bullet.

Zach has been writing notes. You can't necessarily tell what they are just by looking at them, but once he reads them to you they make perfect sense. I saved this one because it's a personal favorite. Follow along with me (hint: Just think about the first letter of each word): "Dear Mom I promise I would get you jewelry for your birthday." (That's a picture of some jewelry between "U" for you and "J" for jewelry.) Get it? Nice, eh? Do you think that there's any jewelry that could delight me more than this note already does?

Girl in the House

From the back seat, on the way home from school, Zach let out a long, heavy breath. "Mom," he sighed, "Who am I going to marry?"

"Well, you don't have to decide right now. You've got plenty of time to decide," I said, trying not to let  him see the huge grin on my face.

Then, considering whether or not to dig further, I plunged right in: "Are there any girls you like right now?"

"Well, Shelby and Ashley are really nice to me in gym class..."

Bingo! Here's the thing about Ashley: She and Zach are in the same classes and sessions together at school, and her mom Leanne and I have become really good friends. Leanne and I also spent three days together on our Sacramento trip this week talk-talk-talking about various things, but we still wanted more time to chat. So earlier that day, we had agreed to try to meet up at the park after Zach's baseball practice and let the kids run around together.

"That's really cool, Zach, because I think we're going to see Ashley for a little play date this afternoon."

So. Fast-forward to the park. While Leanne and I were yakety-yak-yak-ing, Ashley and Zach were having the time of their lives running all over the park together. Before we knew it, it was 6:40 (yes, at night) and I knew that Dave and Luke would be wondering where the heck we were. So I tried to peel the kids apart from each other, and this is what I got:

"When can we have a playdate?"
"Can we have a playdate right now?"
"Can we have a sleepover?"
"I want to go to Ashley's house."
"I want to see Zach's house."

I told Zach, "I know that Friday is the day that Ashley does playdates, so why don't we have her come over on Friday?"

To which Zach leaned over to Ashley and whispered conspiratorially: "It's good news! My mom says we can do it on Friday, and today is Friday, so we can do it today!"

Finally we compromised: Ashley would come over to our house for dinner, and Leanne would pick her up in an hour.

Fast-forward to our house: Imagine Dave and Luke's surprise, when not only did we show up at 6:45 at night, but the first person who walked in the house was a girl.

Ashley and Zach dashed off to the playroom and immediately got wrapped up in some sort of Lego/train project. I was scrambling to make dinner, but I couldn't quite tell what they were doing, so I asked Luke to peek in on them.

Luke returned a few seconds later and said, in a total deadpan, "They're kissing."

Then he cracked a huge grin and said, "I'm totally kidding! They're just playing trains and talking."

Ashley charmed us all at the dinner table chatting about vacation, food, and asking us each about the "highlight" of our day.

Then she and Zach dashed back off to play again. When Leanne came to pick her up, they were camped out on the bunk bed, watching train videos on the iPad, having arranged ten different stuffed cats to sit in a circle with them.

When it was really time to leave, Zach gave her one of his stuffed cats to "sleep over" for the weekend. It truly was just about the best playdate he's ever had. Looks like he's met his match.

First Game of the Season

Coach Dave sets up the ball for little Hot Rod #1.

Zach lines it up for the swing and the hit...

...and he's off and running down the first base line.

But he's not too proud to stop and say, "Hi, Mom!"

Now who is this lanky young ballplayer, about to slam a huge hit off the coach's pitch? (And could that be the same coach that we just saw in a different game an hour earlier? When did he change his shirt?)

Whaddya know, it's our favorite Phillies player!

And he's loving every minute of it.

"My Body"

Through the help of a wonderful speech teacher, Zach seems to be expressing himself better all the time. He has gotten really good at announcing, "That makes me feel mad!" Or sad. Or whatever fill-in-the-blank emotion is churning through his body at the moment. He also has developed this interesting structure of talking about how his body feels. As in, "I know I'm not supposed to have another cookie, but my body really wants one." Or when we are at Target: "I know we said we weren't going to buy any toys right now, but my body really wants a new train set." Dave and I, privately, have turned this into our own joke once the kids go to bed, e.g., "I know I should be doing laundry but my body really wants to watch Downton Abbey."

Luke's body, for the moment, really just wants to cook stuff. Preferably with me and without Zach. When he gets in full cooking mode, he suits up with an apron and closes the pocket door on one side of the kitchen and barricades the other side with pillows. He also created an intimidating "KEEP OUT!!!" sign to hang over the pillow barricade. I'm not sure exactly what the fascination is about, but I know it has something to do with special Mom time that he doesn't get much of. Last night he and I made a beet green salad with chopped endive, strawberries, and leek, all topped with bacon dressing. Yes. Even though we call him a picky eater sometimes, he'll happily eat any raw vegetable. Salad dressings are new for him, but he was so impressed with the bacon dressing that came with a kale salad I got recently that we decided to recreate it. He has already decided that he wants us to throw "lots and lots" of dinner parties in the next few weeks, and we're going to spend some time this weekend planning menus.

As for my body, it is in a little transitional state right now. I signed up for, and was excited about, the Hollywood Half Marathon in early April. However, after just one month of training, my 43-year-old knee cried foul on the whole operation. Two doctors' visits later, I was sent to a physical therapist, who turned out to be a total gem. She sized me up and instantly was able to declare, "This side is a little stronger right here; this foot is a little lower on this side..." etc. At the moment my foot and knee are taped up at the vulnerable points with athletic tape and I'm on a knee-strengthening regimen. Next week she's going to set me up with some pilates workouts, and by the week after that I should be a lean, mean running machine. Or something. I don't know if the half-marathon is going to happen (it's looking unlikely) but if the end result is that I get stronger and fitter, I won't have anything to complain about.

Tired of body talk yet? If not, and if you're not offended by talk about breastfeeding, check out my interview for the "Clever Cleavage" series that ran this week: Clever Cleavage. 

Opening Day Parade

A matter of geography

Luke is obsessed with an app he uses at school and at home called Stack the States, a little trivia game with facts about the U.S. states. He now has an abundance of knowledge on very specific (and possibly useless, unless he appears on Jeopardy) state facts. Example: We just had ski week, and many of his friends go to "Mammoth" (aka Mammoth Mountain  in California) for the week. When we were talking about one friend who was skiing in Mammoth, I discovered that all this time Luke assumed that they were in Kentucky. Because Mammoth Cave is in Kentucky. Hahahaha.

So I told the boys on Friday night that we were going to take a tour of Little India in Artesia the next day. "Little India..." mused Luke. "Is that related to Indiana?" "No, Luke," responded Zach. "Let me show you..." Then Zach went to get his train book and turned to the page with a picture of an Indian timber train. "It's like this train from India."

How did he know that?

Anyway, we went on this food tour of Little India with a bunch of food bloggers, and a person might assume that 4- and 8-year-old kids would not like this. But what's not to like, really? It's like a visit to another country, and everything is cool and different.

Zach seems to be fine with moderately spicy foods. At our first stop we had some khandvi, which is a rolled-up appetizer of spicy garbanzo-flour dough topped with cilantro, coconut, and mustard seeds. There was enough for each person to try one, but that wasn't nearly enough for Zach, who kept agonizing: "But I really want another one." Keep in mind that this is a tour with about 20 other adult food bloggers, and Zach is pounding down khandvi with the best of them.

Now Zach always tells us that he doesn't like mango, and I never pay much attention to him, because what's not to like about mango? So after he ate a whole bunch of spicy foods at our lunch place, I offered him some of the mango lassi (sweet yogurt drink) that we were drinking - and I told him it was a milkshake. He tried it and just gagged. "That...tastes...terrible!" he sputtered, using his napkin to wipe off his tongue and the inside of his mouth. And this after he had just consumed all sorts of spicy and exotic foods. He is one funny little customer.

Luke is clearly tougher to please, but if there's one thing he has in abundance, it's curiosity. He had a field day in the Indian grocery store, helping me pick out produce, different varieties of flour, and all sorts of fun spices. "This reminds me of a social studies class!" he crowed cheerfully. His favorite pick was this teeny-tiny popcorn that he couldn't wait to share with his friend Blake at their sleepover later that night.

Since we've gotten home, I've cooked palak (spinach) paneer, a beautiful golden vegetable curry, and basmati rice steamed with fresh curry leaves and fresh ginger. Without even trying, we are eating entirely gluten-free and vegetarian - and Dave is in seventh heaven. This is truly not the Dave that I first met - it's sort of like Dave 2.0, the older, more health-conscious Dave who finds joy in leafy greens and complex spices. On the road from childhood to adulthood to Little India, life takes all sorts of unusual turns.

Unrelated postscript: Here is why our kids are totally, irrevocably spoiled in a good way. Yesterday was the first morning back to school after a long vacation and Luke was having a very tough time. Right after he left, I noticed a Valentine he had made where he wrote, "Love is...smelling the chocolate chip cookies that my mom makes." It pulled at my heartstrings. So before I picked Luke and Zach up from school, I made some chocolate chip oatmeal cookies, scooped them out on a cookie sheet, and preheated the oven. I called out to Dave (working in his office upstairs), "I'm going to pop these in the oven as soon as I get back with the kids."

When I got home with the kids about 1/2 hour later we opened the door to the smell of fresh-baked cookies. Dave had put them in the oven so that they would be ready when we walked in the door.

We are not rich. Sure, we're not poor, but compared to just about everyone else in our town we are decidedly Not. Rich. But these kids have no idea just how good they have it. With a mom who is home most of the time and a dad who is home all of the time, life is just one big stack of fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies.

What to do, what to do

Quandary: A week off from school. Friends out of town. Two brothers with time on their hands in the afternoon. What to do?

1) Construct a leaf hut.

2) Eat ice cream. Apply chocolate thoroughly over entire face.

3) Explore a fountain (Younger kid: "I'm taking off my shoes and going in!" Older kid: "No! Don't do that! It's too cold! You might cut your foot!" Fast forward to 20 minutes later - Both are in the fountain and wet from the waist down.)

4) Return home. Warm shower for all. Early pajamas. Cozy, late afternoon TV-watching. Ah, vacation.

Watermen

Do we adhere slavishly to a pre-determined schedule while on vacation? Why, thank you for asking. No, we do not. So if Dave and I have this idea that we're going to catch a ferry by a certain time, but the kids decide they'd rather mess around in the pool, chances are we might just change direction and head down to the pool just for the heck of it.

Oh, and hey - Did you know you can make some pretty cool beards and mustaches just from the bubbles in the hot tub?

Carried Away

You have never heard four people laugh so much as tonight at dinner in San Diego. Take four very, very tired people, two of whom are under the age of 10, and add in a day's worth of walking around, some sweat and dirt covered by chlorine from the pool, a bunch of sugar, and Zach laughing so hard he spews lemonade across the table, and that's basically what you get.

The trip started yesterday morning with all four of us boarding the train for San Diego. As you can tell, the excitement was palpable. (The train photo shows the early morning light as we head down the coastline along the beach.) And Zach, ever the intrepid traveler, took responsibility for a large suitcase all by himself.


I picked the hotel largely by price; it was the best one I found where we could get a suite and free breakfast, and was also reasonably close to downtown and the waterfront. But how could I have possibly known how perfect the location was? 1) It is walking distance (about 1/2 mile ) from the aircraft carrier; and 2) it backs up against the train tracks, so about every 10 minutes during the day you hear and then see a train zipping across town. This is mind-numbingly cool for Zach, who rushes to the window every time he hears the whistle. And who could have possibly known this - You can see the train track from the pool, so a person like Zach could basically sit in the pool all day and see a train every ten minutes. Kid paradise, I tell ya.

After we checked in to our room and had lunch in Little Italy, Zach and I went off to Balboa Park to the model railroad museum. Best train museum for a train-loving kid ever, by the way. Then we went for a swim in the hotel pool and went out to dinner at a fish restaurant on the waterfront. Throughout the whole day, Zach kept looking up at me and sighing, "I love spending time with you, Mom." So yeah, I guess you could say I was pretty smitten with our time together.

Meanwhile Dave and Luke went off to their aircraft carrier adventure. I wasn't there, so I'm not quite sure how to sum it up most accurately, but basically they both got certificates of commendation for having "survived" a night on the aircraft carrier, and throughout most of the following day, Luke kept making comments like, "That aircraft carrier really freaked me out."

Best I can tell - they liked learning about the place and touring it, and the food wasn't so bad (no pancakes and applesauce). But they stayed up way too late, had to wake up way too early, slept in skinny little metal triple bunk beds (think sardine cans - you can't sit up in them), and were subjected to a very loud fire alarm. Oh, and there were large wax figures all over the place depicting the various jobs people did on the aircraft carrier, and if there's one thing Luke despises, it's wax figures. Dave and Luke had the opportunity to take the rest of us on the aircraft carrier for a little tour today, but they both decided to skip it - so possibly that is saying something. But now they can say they've done it.

Today everyone was tired but we went back to Balboa Park, and while Zach and Dave did some more time at the railroad museum, Luke and I poked around the cactus garden and watched some street performers.

I put my camera on "auto" and just took a bunch of pictures that I loved, so let's have a little interlude here:

After our slap-happy dinner we trudged back to the hotel. Here is a measure of how tired Dave was: He went to the lobby to grab a newspaper, and then on the way back to our room, he declared brightly to the other people on the elevator: "Hey, if you want to know tomorrow's news today, they've got the Sunday paper out in the lobby already!" To which the other people in the elevator responded, "Um...it is Sunday." And they were probably thinking - Get this guy a good night's sleep.

Which we did.

On the Menu

First things first: Luke won a blue ribbon in a little kata tournament at his karate class tonight. I was so proud of him because 1) He was so obviously, truly, best in his class; 2) He has been working SO hard for this; and 3) He really needed a little boost. Look at how proud he is.

Second, I need a serious answer: How can you not smile when you see this cute Zach face? He and I have been making the rounds of playgrounds around town in our down-time. He invented a special hide-and-seek game that we like to play, and at this particular moment he was in "hiding," hoping not to be seen.

We are headed to San Diego for the weekend for yet another totally kid-driven adventure (what other kind is there, really?). Zach and I are going to do the hotel and railroad museum, while Luke and Dave are going on...an overnight on an aircraft carrier! Yep, you heard that right.

Now imagine, if you're an 8-year-old boy, what your biggest concern would be if you were about to sleep on an aircraft carrier. Where do I sleep? What will it look like? Who will be there? Nope. One of Luke's older pals who had done the sleepover before happened to mention that for breakfast they served pancakes wrapped around applesauce, and this small piece of information has taken on a life of its own for Luke. Anytime anyone mentions the aircraft carrier, all he can think about is the pancake with applesauce and how he's not sure if he's going to like it.

I have tried reasoning with him. "It's an aircraft carrier, Luke. Don't you think they serve more than one thing for breakfast day in and day out, year after year?"

To which Luke made up his own little joke about what happens when you get to the mess hall on the aircraft carrier: They hand you a piece of paper that says, "Menu: #1. Pancakes with applesauce." - and that's it. Then you go for lunch and they hand you another piece of paper: "Menu: #1. Pancakes with applesauce." And so on for each meal.

Truthfully, I don't know what they're going to be eating, and I don't care much, because I think once they get there the magnitude and grandeur of it all will overwhelm him. On the other hand, maybe that's just an 8-year-old's way of dealing with something so enormous - to just take the tiniest little piece of information and obsess over it.

Either way, I know one thing for sure, and that is that Zach and I will be eating fish, chicken nuggets, and matzoh ball soup until it's coming out of our ears.

Pieces of My Heart

The Cub Scout.

The funny guy.

Summer, in my mind, every single day (thanks, Dad.)

City of Brotherly Love

Portrait of the artist as a serious young man

Yesterday Luke's friends were teasing him, and they took it a little too far, and he got upset. That's sad, and everyone's apologized, and it's OK now, but that's not really the story.

The story is that while we were leaving the playground Zach was filled with righteous indignation on Luke's behalf. His first suggestion for how to "get back" at the boys was this: "I think you should go to their house, knock on the door, and then say a bad word."

By the time we got home, Zach was running around trying to figure out what kind of food he could make for Luke. Also he had refined his idea of what would be the ultimate punishment: "I think you should go to their birthday, and then give them a present for a girl. Then they would open the present and say, 'Oh. It's a girl present.'"

The layer of chocolate ice cream that came before the dirt

Something about Zach's concern must have softened Luke up a bit, because he lost the mocking edge that he usually has toward his brother. They were both filthy from the playground and I told them they needed to bathe, so they decided to shower together. The only complication about having Zach in the shower is that it's really hard for me to clean his hair, because I basically have to step in to the shower in order to get him shampooed and rinsed while he protests and squirms away. But they were happy to have a shower together, so whatever.

While they were in the shower, I sat in the bathroom for a little while listening to their conversation and splashing. Then I went off to the kitchen and finished cleaning the dishes, while continuing to hear happy sounds. Then I checked my email, while continuing to hear happy sounds. Then I went back in the bathroom, where the happy sounds continued. And then Luke nonchalantly mentioned, "Oh, by the way, Mom, I  washed and conditioned Zach's hair."

What?!? Really?!?!

This morning when he woke up, Zach announced that he wanted to take a shower with Luke again. We could be on to something here.

What He Said

1) Dave is asking Zach what he thinks their t-ball team should be named - they have to choose from a roster of minor-league team names. Dave runs down the list: "Raptors? Cubs? Hot Rods?...Bulls?"
"Yes!" says Zach.
"OK - Bulls - you like bulls?" asks Dave.
"Yeah - kittens drink from bowls."
So just to reiterate - Zach thinks his t-ball team should be called "The Bowls."

2) Luke and I are headed to watch his friends' basketball game. We walk into a gym, but it turns out it's the wrong gym. When we peek in, we see a bunch of teenagers. "Yeah - we skipped a dimension and fast-forwarded ten years!" crows Luke.

3) Dave goes to an extremely rare guys' night out. When he comes home, he admits sheepishly, "I kept thinking, I couldn't wait for the poker game to be over so I could come home and finish my spreadsheets."

Taking votes now - introvert or extrovert?

Party-mon

You may be asking the question that most of us are asking around here - Are we still celebrating Luke's birthday? Yep, it seems to have morphed into a month-long affair. Even Zach is now convinced that Luke is 9, because he knows Luke turned 8 in December and now Luke just had another birthday.

Anyway, I took a deep breath and invited 17 of Luke's favorite buddies to a park on Sunday for a Pokemon-a-thon. And...success! We lucked out in every possible way. The weather was impossibly gorgeous (70s, sunshine). We reserved just the picnic tables, but we had the park to ourselves because everyone else in town was at the beach. And the kids happily bounced between intense Pokemon trading and a large multi-ball pickup game that seemed to be a combination of football and soccer. (At one point we noticed the boys in a huge pileup, so another mom and I walked over to break it up. We peeled back boy after boy from the scrum, only to find at the bottom of the heap...our four-year-old friend Daniel, completely unfazed and entirely unwilling to loosen his death grip on the football.)

One of the most unexpectedly fun times was after the party at home. Alex and Ella, the two kids who live across the street had come to the party and then had asked Luke if they could come over while he was opening the presents. So when Luke got home, he called them over, and they rushed over to join in the fun. Ella (age 4) decided that she would be Luke's "helper" who would hand him presents, and Alex was the Pokemon expert who surveyed all of Luke's new cards and helped him sort them into piles. Just another benefit to having great friends right in the neighborhood.

And in the end...Did Luke have a good time? I think so - He told us the day was an "800" on a scale of 1 to 10. Oh, and we asked our guests to bring sporting goods to donate to the Boys and Girls Club - and we filled two ENORMOUS boxes, which Luke and I will be donating later this week.

This past weekend is yet another reason why Zach deserves to be sainted. Even with all of the hoopla around the party and the cake and presents for Luke, he showed no signs of jealousy; he was just happy to be there. I got him two little trains as a party favor and when I gave them to him at the end of the party, his face lit up and he went right to the picnic table to play with the trains. My good friend Shannon - a huge Zach fan - sat with him and they talked about trains for a good half-hour while we cleaned up. No complaints; just sheer joy.

I knew that I didn't want to make the whole weekend just about Luke and his party, so on Saturday, Zach and I took a special trip down to San Pedro to ride the old-time trolley along the waterfront. At $1 for unlimited rides, it was just about the best dollar ever spent (Zach rode for free). We chugged up and down the waterfront and the conductor gave Zach a coloring book and engineer hat. As we were leaving, Zach held my hand and said, "Mom, I love being with you."

Enough said. Off to wipe away little tears now...

Extra

In the news:

Zach had a successful playdate with his new friend from his new school yesterday. Apparently they were both so excited about it that they were holding hands all morning during school. Happiness is a new friendship.

Luke's school is so grateful for the volunteer work I have been doing for them (including coordinating a school-wide online survey) that they recognized me at the PTA meeting yesterday and gifted me with a mini red velvet bundt cake. Haven't decided if I will share it yet.

Luke got a special P.E. award at school yesterday during a school-wide assembly. I have a video, and it's mostly long and boring, but I did capture the perfect moment after he heard his name, stood up, started to walk to the stage, and then did a double-take and said, "Wait - did they say me?"

Here's the proud owner of a new t-shirt.

Day in the Life

Southern California - a day in the life:

1) Luke goes on a whale-watching trip; sees three kinds of whales and "1,000" dolphins.

2) Zach has "snow day" at his preschool in 65-degree weather.

Oh, wait - Now Dave just made a video too: